Well here it is my 2000th post! I was remiss on my 1000th post but was determined to put something together for this one. Sorry it's a bit long 
I just couldn't get it significantly shorter. I have posted it in two parts. Oh and my apologies for the slightly clunky writing - I'm not very experienced at this lark!
The day I received the Nobel Prize was certainly the proudest day of my life. Of course it wasn’t really for my own work but rather that of Professor Howard Blake. However that hardly detracted from my pleasure as I accepted in his name. That pleasure wasn’t to last long. I think I now know how Alfred Nobel felt and maybe Oppenheimer too. How will I be remembered?
“Who’s he?” I asked, indicating the slightly scruffy looking man sat hunched over some papers across from us. “Looks a little old for the Student’s Union.”
Jerry leant over for a better look. I always envied him his casual ability to recognise almost anyone on campus.
“Ah, Professor Blake. He’s tolerated down here as he’s not really like any other professors, more akin to us students in many ways. I’m surprised you haven’t come across him before; he’s in your physics department.”
“Blake… yeah, I’m sure I’ve heard the name. Does some weird research that he funds himself but doesn’t do any teaching?”
“That’s the one. I don’t think they trust him to teach, he’s chasing some wild idea that’s apparently going to turn quantum physics on its head. But he’s independently wealthy and I believe he made some remarkable discoveries early in his career before shooting off down his little blind alley, so I guess they tolerate him.”
I thought no more of it until a few days later I was knocked off my feet as Professor Blake careened around a corridor bend, looking more like a rugby player than a professor of physics; head down over a huge pile of loose papers cradled in his arms and held in by his chin. Unlike me he was not a tall man and his head connected perfectly with my solar plexus. The result was a shower of confetti from the professor and silent, eye-popping gasps from me.
“I say, I’m dreadfully sorry. Are you alright?”
“…” I’m sure my face was turning purple.
“Here, let me help you up.”
“…” Vague flapping of arms from me as he started to tug under my armpits. “No…” I managed to gasp. “Okay… fine… just… minute.”
“I’m most terribly sorry; I was in such a hurry you see…” He scratched his head looking at the chaos of paper surrounding us, each page covered in illegible writing, probably all his own I surmised. “I guess there’s a lesson in there.”
I smiled ruefully. “It’s alright, no harm done. Give me a sec and I’ll help you pick them up.” Bizarre, I thought, these sorts of incidents usually happen the other way round. I was beginning to understand Jerry’s likening him to a student.
I scrambled to my knees and helped him corral the scattered sheets of notes. “You’re Professor Blake aren’t you?”
“Why, yes that’s right. You’ve heard of me?” He seemed immensely pleased by that.
“I saw you in the Union a few days ago. A friend told me your name.”
“Ah, probably told you I’m some sort of crackpot I expect.” The pleased expression was slipping towards sadness.
“Not exactly; he did say your research ideas were a little… unorthodox.”
He made a ‘hrmmphing’ noise and looked around for any missed sheets. I really didn’t think anyone, even university professors, made ‘hrmmphing’ noises any longer.
With all the papers collected I somehow found myself meekly following the professor in the opposite direction to the lecture I was now missing and in my arms I was clutching one half of his stack of rebellious notes. I couldn’t imagine how he had managed to carry all of them alone, before acknowledging to myself that he hadn’t done so with notable success.
Once he learnt I was a physics student he spent rest of the walk to his office merrily chattering away about his research like I was his personal post-grad assistant. All very flattering but most of it flew straight over my head. I was only a second year undergrad after all. But, damn, he was infectious and I couldn’t help liking the man.
A month later and I was spending almost all my spare time assisting him. He really should have been allowed to teach; disorganised though he was, his sheer enthusiasm for his subject guaranteed that I was learning more from him than all the rest of my official lecturers put together; those same lecturers who loudly disapproved both of his research and my increasing participation in it.
“They think I’m completely potty, you know.” The professor said one day early on in our acquaintance. “I know the idea of jumping from one place to another instantaneously and anywhere in the universe may seem counter intuitive but then so does most of quantum physics!” Blake wanted to be liked; he hated his pariah status with a passion but his passion for his research was even stronger.
“How does that jump work, sir?” I asked innocently enough.
He looked at me appraisingly. “Hmm, well it doesn’t yet and the quantum field mathematics is probably still a little beyond you!” I smiled at his gentle sarcasm. “However the rest of it is essentially quite simple. You are aware, I trust, of the principle that any particle of matter can (and indeed does) exist in every possible location in the universe simultaneously.”
I nodded.
“Ha, they all accept that ridiculous statement without so much as a lifted eyebrow and yet still won’t listen to my ideas. You see it’s really quite simple; the reason everything is not frantically hopping all over the universe on some sort of grand tour is that it is all governed by probability. Yes, there is a chance that workbench over there could suddenly jump ten metres to the right but the probability is so vanishingly small you would have to wait many times the entire life of the universe to have even the remotest chance of seeing it happen.”
“But it could happen.” I said.
“Absolutely, there is a small possibility that it might appear instantaneously anywhere in the universe. That possibility gets smaller the further away you look and the greater the mass but it is still a theoretical possibility.” After a brief pause he added, “Bear in mind that ‘small’ really is an inadequate word to describe such tiny possibilities.”
“You think you can change those probabilities?” I asked.
“Change? No. Impossible.” But his eyes twinkled. “What I believe I can do with the quantum field is slip out the back door so to speak. The probabilities remain the same but I shift the location they are directed at. Let us suppose the chances of finding that desk at its current location are… I don’t know, say a trillion to one. Well, we don’t change that probability, just the location. So now the chances are a trillion to one that it will be located ten metres to the right. So that is where it will now be; instantaneously! It’s like we’ve grabbed a tablecloth and given it a quick tug. Nothing has been physically done to the objects on the table but they are now sitting on a different part of the tablecloth.”
“You really think you can do it?” By now I was beginning to get excited. This is wild, I thought.
“Absolutely, I’m convinced I’ve almost got the quantum field tuned now. It won’t be long.”
A few weeks later I was ambling my way over to the Physics department reflecting on how my university career had been turned upside down in just one month. Jerry had advised me to distance myself from Blake; “You’ll do yourself no favours, the rest of the faculty will see you in his shadow and they’ll write you off!” But it was too late, I liked the guy and I was addicted to his science.
As I rounded the corner I was confronted by a scene of chaos. Outside the front of the physics building there were dozens of police cars, ambulances and fire engines along with a crowd of onlookers. Three floors up in the corner where the professor’s lab should have been there was just a gaping hole.
I just couldn't get it significantly shorter. I have posted it in two parts. Oh and my apologies for the slightly clunky writing - I'm not very experienced at this lark!Nobel's Dynamite Part 1
The day I received the Nobel Prize was certainly the proudest day of my life. Of course it wasn’t really for my own work but rather that of Professor Howard Blake. However that hardly detracted from my pleasure as I accepted in his name. That pleasure wasn’t to last long. I think I now know how Alfred Nobel felt and maybe Oppenheimer too. How will I be remembered?
* * *
“Who’s he?” I asked, indicating the slightly scruffy looking man sat hunched over some papers across from us. “Looks a little old for the Student’s Union.”
Jerry leant over for a better look. I always envied him his casual ability to recognise almost anyone on campus.
“Ah, Professor Blake. He’s tolerated down here as he’s not really like any other professors, more akin to us students in many ways. I’m surprised you haven’t come across him before; he’s in your physics department.”
“Blake… yeah, I’m sure I’ve heard the name. Does some weird research that he funds himself but doesn’t do any teaching?”
“That’s the one. I don’t think they trust him to teach, he’s chasing some wild idea that’s apparently going to turn quantum physics on its head. But he’s independently wealthy and I believe he made some remarkable discoveries early in his career before shooting off down his little blind alley, so I guess they tolerate him.”
I thought no more of it until a few days later I was knocked off my feet as Professor Blake careened around a corridor bend, looking more like a rugby player than a professor of physics; head down over a huge pile of loose papers cradled in his arms and held in by his chin. Unlike me he was not a tall man and his head connected perfectly with my solar plexus. The result was a shower of confetti from the professor and silent, eye-popping gasps from me.
“I say, I’m dreadfully sorry. Are you alright?”
“…” I’m sure my face was turning purple.
“Here, let me help you up.”
“…” Vague flapping of arms from me as he started to tug under my armpits. “No…” I managed to gasp. “Okay… fine… just… minute.”
“I’m most terribly sorry; I was in such a hurry you see…” He scratched his head looking at the chaos of paper surrounding us, each page covered in illegible writing, probably all his own I surmised. “I guess there’s a lesson in there.”
I smiled ruefully. “It’s alright, no harm done. Give me a sec and I’ll help you pick them up.” Bizarre, I thought, these sorts of incidents usually happen the other way round. I was beginning to understand Jerry’s likening him to a student.
I scrambled to my knees and helped him corral the scattered sheets of notes. “You’re Professor Blake aren’t you?”
“Why, yes that’s right. You’ve heard of me?” He seemed immensely pleased by that.
“I saw you in the Union a few days ago. A friend told me your name.”
“Ah, probably told you I’m some sort of crackpot I expect.” The pleased expression was slipping towards sadness.
“Not exactly; he did say your research ideas were a little… unorthodox.”
He made a ‘hrmmphing’ noise and looked around for any missed sheets. I really didn’t think anyone, even university professors, made ‘hrmmphing’ noises any longer.
With all the papers collected I somehow found myself meekly following the professor in the opposite direction to the lecture I was now missing and in my arms I was clutching one half of his stack of rebellious notes. I couldn’t imagine how he had managed to carry all of them alone, before acknowledging to myself that he hadn’t done so with notable success.
Once he learnt I was a physics student he spent rest of the walk to his office merrily chattering away about his research like I was his personal post-grad assistant. All very flattering but most of it flew straight over my head. I was only a second year undergrad after all. But, damn, he was infectious and I couldn’t help liking the man.
A month later and I was spending almost all my spare time assisting him. He really should have been allowed to teach; disorganised though he was, his sheer enthusiasm for his subject guaranteed that I was learning more from him than all the rest of my official lecturers put together; those same lecturers who loudly disapproved both of his research and my increasing participation in it.
“They think I’m completely potty, you know.” The professor said one day early on in our acquaintance. “I know the idea of jumping from one place to another instantaneously and anywhere in the universe may seem counter intuitive but then so does most of quantum physics!” Blake wanted to be liked; he hated his pariah status with a passion but his passion for his research was even stronger.
“How does that jump work, sir?” I asked innocently enough.
He looked at me appraisingly. “Hmm, well it doesn’t yet and the quantum field mathematics is probably still a little beyond you!” I smiled at his gentle sarcasm. “However the rest of it is essentially quite simple. You are aware, I trust, of the principle that any particle of matter can (and indeed does) exist in every possible location in the universe simultaneously.”
I nodded.
“Ha, they all accept that ridiculous statement without so much as a lifted eyebrow and yet still won’t listen to my ideas. You see it’s really quite simple; the reason everything is not frantically hopping all over the universe on some sort of grand tour is that it is all governed by probability. Yes, there is a chance that workbench over there could suddenly jump ten metres to the right but the probability is so vanishingly small you would have to wait many times the entire life of the universe to have even the remotest chance of seeing it happen.”
“But it could happen.” I said.
“Absolutely, there is a small possibility that it might appear instantaneously anywhere in the universe. That possibility gets smaller the further away you look and the greater the mass but it is still a theoretical possibility.” After a brief pause he added, “Bear in mind that ‘small’ really is an inadequate word to describe such tiny possibilities.”
“You think you can change those probabilities?” I asked.
“Change? No. Impossible.” But his eyes twinkled. “What I believe I can do with the quantum field is slip out the back door so to speak. The probabilities remain the same but I shift the location they are directed at. Let us suppose the chances of finding that desk at its current location are… I don’t know, say a trillion to one. Well, we don’t change that probability, just the location. So now the chances are a trillion to one that it will be located ten metres to the right. So that is where it will now be; instantaneously! It’s like we’ve grabbed a tablecloth and given it a quick tug. Nothing has been physically done to the objects on the table but they are now sitting on a different part of the tablecloth.”
“You really think you can do it?” By now I was beginning to get excited. This is wild, I thought.
“Absolutely, I’m convinced I’ve almost got the quantum field tuned now. It won’t be long.”
A few weeks later I was ambling my way over to the Physics department reflecting on how my university career had been turned upside down in just one month. Jerry had advised me to distance myself from Blake; “You’ll do yourself no favours, the rest of the faculty will see you in his shadow and they’ll write you off!” But it was too late, I liked the guy and I was addicted to his science.
As I rounded the corner I was confronted by a scene of chaos. Outside the front of the physics building there were dozens of police cars, ambulances and fire engines along with a crowd of onlookers. Three floors up in the corner where the professor’s lab should have been there was just a gaping hole.
* * *
To be continued...
