MC's Emotions

[monsterchic]

Little bit of backstory: My MC had to watch his parents being murdered and had his mind wiped after. Now, he's just found out that the man he has called father all these years is the one who murdered his parents. He's an assassin, but would it be okay for him to cry in this situation? His world has been basically upended, but he's supposed to be strong...

 

[kshRox]

How old is he?
What demeanor do you want to impart?

Tears of rage rolling down a stoic face as he stands immobile?
One small drop escaping from the corner of his eye?
Does he break down sobbing uncontrollably?
Does he 'lose it' in a rage tearing apart something or attacking someone while tears roll freely from his eyes?

I don't think 'is it ok for him to cry' is the question.
Really, how does he digest this information emotionally and what is his physical reaction?

 

[monsterchic]

This is the end of the scene. Is this okay? Maybe should have been posted in critiques...


“Memories of what?” I asked.

“Memories of your parents' deaths,” my mother said gently.

“How do you know?”

My mother looked at my father, then to Niallin. He looked back atmy father, who had eyes full of pain. He put his hands across thetable, close to mine, looked me in the eyes, and said, “I was there. I was the one who caused those memories, Sai. Your parents...” His voice faded into the background as snippets of recalled information flashed across my vision. Black, silver and red whirled across my unseeing eyes. And a voice, saying, “You are ours.” Screaming, pulling away, confined by ropes.

My vision snapped back into focus as I started to recall what had happened. I couldn't remember when, but I remembered.

“Do you remember, son?” he said, reaching for my hands.

I pulled them back slowly while staring in horror at the man who had raised me, the man who had murdered my true parents in my sight.

“Saibhreas...” my mother started to say.

My head whipped around to where she was seated next to Niallin. Myeyes were wide, lips pulled back in a grimace as I shook my head back and forth, trying to believe it wasn't true. Breathing rapidly, I pressed my hands to the table and partially lifted myself out of my chair, head turning from side to side, from the man I could no longer call father to my mother.

My father stretched his arm out, presumably to touch me and bring me back to earth. I flinched, hands flying back. “Don't touch me,”I spat venomously. “Don't come anywhere near me.” My eyes opened wider and began to fill. It was all coming back: the hunt,coming back to find my home about to be broken into. The horror of having to watch Mai and Pai die while I was forced to watch.

“You monster,” I hissed as my head took one last spin around the table before I fled into the night, hurt and alone.



Then he flees into the forest and is trying to make sense of it all, still remembering the horror of their deaths

 

[Jo Zebedee]

Firstly, what does he remember of the murder? Is it buried deep within him and he can't access the memories? Or does he have a memory. There are theories about hidden trauma vs. real trauma, some of which you could find more out about by looking at counselling theories. An easy to use self awareness tool is called the Johari Window, which you could google and complete one for him, so that you can tell where the trauma sits within his personality?

In terms of the dam breaking - and I am no expert, btw, but I did a fair bit of ad-hoc research for my last wip - no matter how stoic we are, there is a capacity within all of us to break. It's where you put that limit.

eg. many sufferers of anxiety present as the most capable people who have a trauma, usually over a period of time, that breaks through their coping strategies. As they like to control - presumably the way your assassin does - this is a major event, the losing of control.

It's worth thinking about why he is upset: betrayal, fear, memory - each will have a different effect. And, yep, the type of crying will have an impact: very controlled, or a breakdown, or something else? I think it's probably worth doing a bit of searching about victims of both remembered and hidden trauma, and the impact of same.

But male protagonists having a cry; that can have a real impact, especially if they're set up not to.

Just seen the above, so you have a memory, and the shock of that coming back. I think in that instance an out of character response is appropriate. How does he come back from it? Vengeful? Angry at himself? Unable to move past the memory?

 

[kshRox]

This is the end of the scene. Is this okay? Maybe should have been posted in critiques...


“Memories of what?” I asked.

“Memories of your parents' deaths,” my mother said gently.

“How do you know?”

My mother looked at my father, then to Niallin. He looked back atmy father, who had eyes full of pain. He put his hands across thetable, close to mine, looked me in the eyes, and said, “I was there. I was the one who caused those memories, Sai. Your parents...” His voice faded into the background as snippets of recalled information flashed across my vision. Black, silver and red whirled across my unseeing eyes. And a voice, saying, “You are ours.” Screaming, pulling away, confined by ropes.

My vision snapped back into focus as I started to recall what had happened. I couldn't remember when, but I remembered.

“Do you remember, son?” he said, reaching for my hands.

I pulled them back slowly while staring in horror at the man who had raised me, the man who had murdered my true parents in my sight.

“Saibhreas...” my mother started to say.

My head whipped around to where she was seated next to Niallin. Myeyes were wide, lips pulled back in a grimace as I shook my head back and forth, trying to believe it wasn't true. Breathing rapidly, I pressed my hands to the table and partially lifted myself out of my chair, head turning from side to side, from the man I could no longer call father to my mother.

My father stretched his arm out, presumably to touch me and bring me back to earth. I flinched, hands flying back. “Don't touch me,”I spat venomously. “Don't come anywhere near me.” My eyes opened wider and began to fill. It was all coming back: the hunt,coming back to find my home about to be broken into. The horror of having to watch Mai and Pai die while I was forced to watch.

“You monster,” I hissed as my head took one last spin around the table before I fled into the night, hurt and alone.



Then he flees into the forest and is trying to make sense of it all, still remembering the horror of their deaths

From simply a content perspective I think this works well.
I would perhaps work on the line 'from the man I could no longer call father'

It seems premature as the thought process I assume would need to digest this information before coming to this conclusion. Other than that I feel like it is a powerful excerpt that again, works well.

 

[Colbey Frost]

I think an assassin should be cold. They are stereotyped in this way. If your assassin is cold all the way through and then shows emotion, then I would not take this and would feel like you've changed the rules.

What you could do is show the character's emotions when he kills someone. He could be cold, calculated when he is planning, but when he kills someone, to show the reader he's still human and likable, he could have some emotion.

So small bits of human emotions building up each time, so when he finds out the truth, it's not unexpected when all his emotions he's been feeling, holding back, combined with the actual truth, lead to a tear.

 

[kshRox]

I think an assassin should be cold. They are stereotyped in this way. If your assassin is cold all the way through and then shows emotion, then I would not take this and would feel like you've changed the rules.

What you could do is show the character's emotions when he kills someone. He could be cold, calculated when he is planning, but when he kills someone, to show the reader he's still human and likable, he could have some emotion.

So small bits of human emotions building up each time, so when he finds out the truth, it's not unexpected when all his emotions he's been feeling, holding back, combined with the actual truth, lead to a tear.

I'm not sure I agree.
A very shallow two dimensional character may play for a one-note charley but a character with depth that grows as an individual and can make us empathize would be much more interesting.

 

[Abernovo]

Men cry. Even the hardest of men can break down. It does depend upon what triggers them and whether or not they're trying to hold it back. Sometimes holding it back can result in giant sobs when the dam finally breaks.

Perhaps you should ask what he is crying for. I know that might sound strange, but it's not really. Presumably, as a child, he wept for his parents, his loss, his feelings of abandonment by them (common emotion) etc. Now, he's learning the truth, so he has to grieve for the correct reason. But, despite that, the loss isn't necessarily the same. So, is he perhaps also horrified by the fact that he has been moulded as an heir by the very person who killed his parents? That his life is a lie?

It's like a complicated knot that unravels, each string an emotion.

Basically, I'd say it's okay for him to cry, but you need to know (even if it's not all put down in the story) the reasons behind him crying. The when and where he cries and how he brings himself to stop may also matter - perhaps not wanting to show 'weakness' in front of others, or getting angry if they see him in tears.

 

[Gumboot]

I think an assassin should be cold. They are stereotyped in this way.

Personally I totally disagree. Even if we limit ourselves to the 2 dimensional cardboard cutout assassin there's a variety of different archetypes, from the cold emotionless professional to the unhinged psychopath who does it for fun.

Countless books and films have, of course, produced much, much more complex and compelling characters who were assassins (Fitz in the Farseer Trilogy springs instantly to mind).

 

[nubins]

I think it depends mostly on what memory he has of his parents. If he remembers them completely... then not unreasonable for him to shed a tear. If he barely remembers them, or its a distant memory.. i think its unlikely that would make him well up, but maybe the realisation that, in his mind, what are his real parents (ie the living ones) are basically full of **** and have been lying to him may still cause a bit of emotion.

Grief really only hits hard if you are very close to those you have lost - if he wasnt close to his biological parents, or was so distant that he has very limited memory of any contact with them I'm sure it would affect him, but not in a sudden strong way, more of a quiet contemplation sort of way.

 

[hopewrites]

I would echo Abernovo, you tell us his memories of the killing were originally wiped. It appears the wipe was not permanent because the dinner conversation is the adoptive parents trying to help him deal with the fragments that have been surfacing up to this point.
So what is he grieving now? the loss of his parents a second time? the loss of his second parents? a reclamation of who and what he was before (the change doesnt have to be bad to need time to grieve the loss of the past that proceeded it. Check out DOE's thread about super heroes to get a list of grieving steps)?

I'm also of the party that wants characters to be as dimensional as possible. I would say that crying in and of itself would not be unplausible; but it will depend on how you do it, that will make it plausible.

 

[Colbey Frost]

I'm not sure I agree.
A very shallow two dimensional character may play for a one-note charley but a character with depth that grows as an individual and can make us empathize would be much more interesting.

Personally I totally disagree. Even if we limit ourselves to the 2 dimensional cardboard cutout assassin there's a variety of different archetypes, from the cold emotionless professional to the unhinged psychopath who does it for fun.

Countless books and films have, of course, produced much, much more complex and compelling characters who were assassins (Fitz in the Farseer Trilogy springs instantly to mind).

Maybe I should have put that I see them this way. I have limited experience with them, makes me want to read / watch more about them now

 

[hopewrites]

Maybe I should have put that I see them this way. I have limited experience with them, makes me want to read / watch more about them now

For my money, I'd start with Dr Horrible's Singalong Blog. It was only released on YouTube but I understand a DVD is now available (I want one!!)
The protagonist is a villain.

 

[Grinnel]

I would think that if the MC does not remember his parents or the events surrounding thier death, I imagine he would feel angry and betrayed. I can't see him being sad or broken-hearted if he never knew his parents, but I can see him never trusting 'daddy'

 

[Galacticdefender]

I think anger would be a bigger emotion here than sadness, as he never really knew his real parents. I could see the character crying "tears of rage" or something though.

 

[MstrTal]

A Lot depends on how you have built up your character in the previous chapters.

As someone who has a few blankspots in his memory and has on occasion had events trigger buried memories I can say that it does take time to digest new information. Especially traumatic events being brought to life after decades. So while yes we men do cry your Protagonist may not cry right away.

In fact both for realism and for dramatic tension perhaps delaying the emotional breakdown portion until the character resolves a few issues relating to the revelation of the trauma may be a workable solution.