Fave Buffy Quotes

[Highlander II]

it isn't - w/ = with - period - there is no abbreviation for while or when or other 'question' words - only with b/c it's used so frequently -


anyway ---


only quote i have is this one:

Xander: I could go get Buffy. Or, or you could fight it.
Spike: Yeah, I could do that, but I'm paralyzed with not caring very much.

"Triangle"

honestly - i'll try to remember/find some other ones and i'll be back ----- (stupid quotes - they all flee my brain when i'm getting ready to use one!)

 

[Asmiley]

Hee-hee. I know what you mean.

 

[Highlander II]

okay - from "School Hard"

Snyder: A lot of educators tell students, 'Think of your principal as your pal.' <pause> I say, 'Think of me as your judge, jury, and executioner.' Tell me, who do you think is the most troublesome student in this school? Well, it is quite a match between you two. On the one hand, Buffy hasn't stabbed a horticulture teacher with a trowel.

Sheila: I didn't stab anyone with a trowel. They were pruning shears.

Snyder: On the other hand, Sheila has never burned down a school building.

Buffy: W-well, that was never proven. The Fire Marshall said i-it
coulda been mice.

Snyder: Mice.

Buffy: M-mice that were smoking?

Snyder: The two of you seem to be tied in the class-cutting and fight-starting events. You really are neck and neck here. It's quite exciting.

Sheila: What does the winner get?

Snyder: Expelled. (Buffy looks at him in shock) Thursday is Parent-Teacher night. Your parents, assuming you have any, will meet your teachers, assuming you have any left. I've decided to put the two of you in charge of this event. You have three days to prepare the refreshments, make the banners and transform the school lounge into a habitable place for adults. This will incur my good will. And may affect what I tell your parents when I meet them. Are we clear?

Buffy: I'm clear. (to Sheila) Don't you feel clear? (Sheila just looks
back) We're very clear.

Snyder: Good. Because you mess up this time, and your parents will be coming to clean out your lockers.


<copied from psyche transcripts - w/ a few alterations>

 

[Highlander II]

are we steering clear of S6 quotes? b/c I don't wanna post any if they might spoil something for someone --


(and I can't recall if there already are some here - sorry)



Buffy: "...I'm Buffy, and you're history."

from S1 (I think - can't remember the ep - "Never Kill a Boy on the First Date" maybe?)

 

[obcooke]

[Highlander II: are we steering clear of S6 quotes?]

Just for a little longer until I can get confirmation that all the episodes have aired in far-away places (like Australia).

Besides the season hasn't ended in the UK yet.

 

[Highlander II]

no problem -

just wanted to check before tossing them out ---

there are some good ones from S6 --

hmmmm --


good one from earlier -



"This is the crack team that foils my every plan? I'm deeply shamed." -- Spike -- "Something Blue"

 

[Shaun]

Originally posted by obcooke
Just for a little longer until I can get confirmation that all the episodes have aired in far-away places (like Australia).

Well the last episode we saw was "Doublemeat Palace", so it'll be a while before we finish s6 (if we ever do.)


Buffy:Oz, you OK? I mean, if it's possible, you seem more monosyllabic than usual.

 

[obcooke]

[Shaun: Well the last episode we saw was "Doublemeat Palace", so it'll be a while before we finish s6 (if we ever do.)]

So, I guess it will be at least 2-3 months before Season Six becomes open game for all the forums.

Don't worry Shaun, I'm sure that you will get to see the finale sooner or later. Until you do, I'll try to keep the spoilers away. But, man, do you have a lot to look forward to and a lot to dread before you reach the end.

 

[Vampyre]

So, I guess it will be at least 2-3 months before Season Six becomes open game for all the forums.

I think you're forgetting that season six is only just finishing on Sky here in the UK, it'll be quite a while before people without Sky get through S6.

 

[obcooke]

[Vampyre: I think you're forgetting that season six is only just finishing on Sky here in the UK, it'll be quite a while before people without Sky get through S6.]

Thanks for the reminder, Vamp. Do you know where the rest of UK is on episodes? I guess I could check out a world-wide TV schedule site, I think I have one in my collection.

My first season as a moderator, there is slight learning curve. BTW, thanks to everyone for their support, advice and patience.

 

[obcooke]

To help us make it until Season Six joins the Quote thread here, I've put together some Season Five Quotes.


XANDER: Buffy's gone insane.

WILLOW: What? What'd she do?

XANDER: Brace yourself. You're not gonna believe it.

TARA: Everyone, before we jump all over her, people do strange things when someone they love dies. When I lost my mother, I- I did some pretty dumb stuff, like lying to my family and staying out all night.

ANYA: Buffy's boinking Spike.

WILLOW: Oh...! Well, Ta- Tara's right. Grief can be powerful, and we shouldn't judge...

TARA: What are you, kidding? She's nuts!

--------------------------------------------------------

SPIKE: She's upset about her mum. And if she turns to me for comfort, well, I'm not gonna deny it to her. I'm not a monster.

XANDER: Yes. You are a monster. Vampires are monsters. They make monster movies about them.

SPIKE: Well, yeah, you got me there.

--------------------------------------------------------

FIRST SLAYER: You're afraid that being the Slayer means losing your humanity.

BUFFY: Does it?

FIRST SLAYER: You are full of love. You love with all of your soul. It's brighter than the fire... blinding. That's why you pull away from it.

--------------------------------------------------------

GLORY [about Spike]: What the hell is that, and why is his hair that color?

MURK: Stunning one, we believe he is...

MURK AND JINX: The Key!

GLORY: Really? That's fantabulous...! And impossible. He can't be The Key, because, see, The Key... has to be pure. This is a vampire. Lesson number one, vampires equal impure.

SPIKE: Yeah, damn right I'm impure. I'm as impure as the driven yellow snow.

--------------------------------------------------------

XANDER: Buffy, we care about you, and we're worried about you. The way you're acting, the things you're doing...

ANYA: It's wrong.

WILLOW: Wait. This shouldn't be about blame.

BUFFY: Blame? There's blame now?

WILLOW: No, there's only love. And... some fear.

ANYA: Which is kind of thrown by the you-having-sex-with-Spike.

BUFFY: The... Who whating how with huh?!

ANYA: Okay, that's denial. That usually comes before anger.

BUFFY: I am not having sex with Spike!

ANYA: Anger.

XANDER: No one is judging you. It's understandable. Spike is strong and mysterious and sort of compact but well-muscled.

BUFFY: I am not having sex with Spike! But I'm starting to think that you might be.

--------------------------------------------------------

XANDER [about the Buffybot]: Spike must have had her built so he could program her t...

BUFFY: Oh God.

WILLOW: Yikes. Imagine the things...

BUFFY: No...! No... No imagining... any of you.

XANDER: Already got the visual.

--------------------------------------------------------

GLORY: So start talkin'.

SPIKE: Yeah. Okay. The Key. Here's the thing... It's that guy... on TV... What's his name?

GLORY: On the television?

SPIKE: That show... The prize show... where they guess what stuff cost?

MURK: The Price Is Right?

JINX: Oh, Bob Barker!

MURK: We will bring you Bob Barker! We will bring you the limp and beaten body of Bob Bark...

GLORY: It is not Bob Barker, scabby morons! The Key is new to this world... and Bob Barker is as old as grit. The vampire... is lying to me.

SPIKE: Yeah... but it was fun. And guess what, bitch. I'm not telling you Jack. You're never gonna get your sodding key, 'cause you might be strong, but in our world, you're an idiot.

GLORY: I am a God.

SPIKE: The God of What? ...Bad home perms?

GLORY: Shut up! I command you, shut up!

SPIKE: Yeah, okay, sorry, but I just had no idea that Gods were such prancing lightweights. Mark my words, The Slayer... is going to kick your skanky, lopsided ass back to whatever place would take a... cheap, whorish, fashion victim ex-God like you.

--------------------------------------------------------

XANDER: Honey... Old saying. "A watched customer never buys."

ANYA: They would if they were patriotic.

XANDER: Okay, I'm goin' in... Patriotic?

ANYA: Yes. I've recently come to realize there's more to me than just being human. I'm also an American.

GILES: Yes, I suppose you are, in a manner of speaking. You were born here - your mortal self.

ANYA: Well, that's right, Foreigner. So I've been reading a lot about the good ol' U.S. of A, embracing the extraordinarily precious ideology that's helped to shape and define it.

WILLOW: Democracy?

ANYA: Capitalism. The free market depends on the profitable exchange of goods for currency. It's a system of symbiotic beauty apparently lost on these old people. Look at 'em. Perusing the shelves. Undressing the merchandise with their eyeballs... All ogle, no cash. It's not just annoying, it's un-American.

GILES: Appalling. Almost as if they no longer think money can buy happiness.

--------------------------------------------------------

XANDER: Hey, what's up? It's Dawn Giovanni and the Buffster.

--------------------------------------------------------

BUFFY: Well, it's just for now. I mean, I'm thinking that I'm probably gonna go back next semester.

XANDER: And that's cool too. Whatever you choose, you've got my support. Just think of me as... as your... You know, I'm searching for supportive things, and I'm comin' up all bras, so... something slightly more manly, think of me as that.

--------------------------------------------------------

GILES [about Dawn]: You're just going to have to put your foot down with her.

BUFFY: I try. It's just... my foot's not used to being put down. I want you to do it. You can be the foot-putting-downer.

GILES: No, Buffy, I don't think I can.

BUFFY: Please? Pretty please? I mean, your foot is way bigger than mine! And you're so much more a grownup than me. Dawn needs an authority figure - a strong guiding hand. She'll listen to you.

GILES: Just like you always have.

--------------------------------------------------------

WILLOW: ...I'd totally be blowing off classes if I were in Dawnie's shoes.

TARA: Sweetie, you wouldn't blow off a class if your head was on fire.

--------------------------------------------------------

WILLOW: Well, I took Psych 101. I mean, I took it from an evil government scientist, who was skewered by her Frankenstein-like creation before the final, but I know what a Freudian slip is.

--------------------------------------------------------

GILES: I hope this isn't a return. Everyone wants petrified hamsters and they're never happy with them.

--------------------------------------------------------

GLORY: Think about it. You think your hand hurts? Imagine what you'd feel with my fingers wiggling in your brain. It doesn't kill you. What it does... is make you feel like you're in a noisy little dark room... naked and ashamed... and there are things in the dark that need to hurt you because you're bad... little pinching things that go in your ears... and crawl on the inside of your skull. And you know... that if the noise and the crawling would stop... that you could remember how to get out........ But you never, ever will.

--------------------------------------------------------

GILES: There must be something in the Book of Tarnis that we've missed, something we can use against Glory.

ANYA: Piano!

XANDER: Because that's what we used to kill that big demon that one time...! No wait, that... that was a rocket launcher. Ahn, what are you talking about?

ANYA: We should drop a piano on her... Well, it always works for that creepy cartoon rabbit when he's running from that nice man with the speech impediment.

--------------------------------------------------------

ANYA: Anybody else feel that?

WILLOW: What?

ANYA: Cold draft of paralyzing fear.

GILES: We just need to stay calm.

WILLOW: Calm, right.

XANDER: Hey, we gotta be like Sergeant Rock. Cool and collected in the face of overwhelming odds.

ANYA: Over-whelming? How much more than whelming would that be exactly?

--------------------------------------------------------

SPIKE: Buckle up, kids. Daddy's puttin' the hammer down.

--------------------------------------------------------

ANYA: Shouldn't somebody be asking, "Are we there yet?" Isn't that what small entertaining children do?

DAWN: That kinda only works if you know where you're going.

ANYA: Do we know where we're going yet?

--------------------------------------------------------

DAWN: Hey. I think Anya's gonna try to cook. Wanna come watch the tears and recriminations?

--------------------------------------------------------

BUFFY: I like this. Thanks.

ANYA: Here to help. Wanna live.

XANDER: Smart chicks are so hot.

WILLOW: You couldn't have figured that out in tenth grade?

--------------------------------------------------------

XANDER: Spike's sexbot. Why didn't they just melt it down into scrap?

ANYA: Maybe Willow wanted it.

XANDER: I don't think Willow feels that way about, about Buffy. I mean, I know she's gone through a lot of changes, but...

ANYA: To study it.

XANDER: Right... Robotics... Science...

ANYA: Pervert.

XANDER: Other pervert.

--------------------------------------------------------

WILLOW: Well, I've been charting their essences. Mapping out. I think... If I can get close enough, I may be able to reverse what Glory did. Like, take back what she took from Tara. It might weaken Glory, or... make her less coherent. Or it might make all our heads explode.

--------------------------------------------------------

BUFFY: Okay. I'll grab some weapons too.

XANDER: I'm looking for something in a broadsword.

SPIKE: Don't be swingin' that thing near me.

XANDER: Hey, I happen to be...

SPIKE: A glorified bricklayer?

XANDER: I'm also a swell bowler.

ANYA: Has his own shoes.

SPIKE: The gods themselves do tremble.

--------------------------------------------------------

SPIKE: Well, not exactly the St. Crispin's Day speech, was it?

GILES: We few... We happy few.

SPIKE: We band of buggered.

<The Final Lines of the Speech:

We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;
For he to-day that sheds his blood with me
Shall be my brother; be he ne'er so vile,
This day shall gentle his condition;
And gentlemen in England now-a-bed
Shall think themselves accurs'd they were not here,
And hold their manhoods cheap whiles any speaks
That fought with us upon Saint Crispin's day.

The Chivalry Bookshelf
The Knighthood, Tournaments & Chivalry Resource Library>

 

[slayerette]

Xander: "I won't waste the perfect comeback on you,but don't think I don't have it.Oh, yes, it's time will come"


:smiliea: :smiliea: :smiliea: :smiliea: :smiliea:
hi,

 

[obcooke]

It's been a while, how about some wedding memories?

---------------------------------------------------------------------

XANDER: The radio said no traffic.

ANYA: It's a hell radio, of course it said that. We'll never get to the airport in time to pick up your stupid Uncle.

XANDER: It just gives my Uncle Rory more time at the bar. Trust me, he'll be happy.

ANYA: Great. So he can sleep off his drunken stupor on our newly re-upholstered couch.

XANDER: He can't afford a hotel.

ANYA: Why are you defending him?

XANDER: I'm not. I hate my uncle. I hate my whole family. That's why I'm marrying you, to start a new family. Have children, make them hate us, then one day they'll get married, we'll sleep on their couch. It's the circle of life.

ANYA: Well, the Gnarals are teleporting in, in twenty minutes. If I'm not there to greet them... somebody's getting incinerated.

XANDER: Why did we ever agree to have your friends, who are demons, and my family, who are monsters, stay at our place?

ANYA: Well, I can only do so much, Xander. Planning this marriage is like staging the invasion of Normandy.

XANDER: Without the laughs. We should have eloped.

ANYA: No! I've been through too much planning this wedding, and it is going to happen. It is going to be our perfect, perfect day if I have to kill every one of our guests and half this town to do it.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

WILLOW: Oh my god, last night, that rehearsal dinner. That was like a, a zoo without the table manners....

---------------------------------------------------------------------

WILLOW: ...Ugh, did you see how much they [Xander's family] drank?

BUFFY: Kinda. Mr. Harris threw up in my purse.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

VERSION 1

ANYA: I, Anya, promise to... love you, to cherish you, to honor you, uh... but not to obey you, of course, because that's anachronistic and misogynistic and who do you think you are, like a sea captain or something?

However, I do entrust you with... um, with my heart. Take care of my heart, won't you please? Take care of it because, it's all that I have. And, if you let me, I'll take care of your heart too. I'll protect it and tend to it, like a little stray... Wait, no... Like a, a little mangy stray that needs a home... No, that's not it either.

---------------------------------------------------------------------
At the wedding

D'HOFFRYN: ...May the love we celebrate today avoid an almost inevitable decline. [edited] I brought a gift. I suppose there's a table.

[edited]

DAWN: Hmm. Neat. I can put this on the table for you.

D'HOFFRYN: Thank you. Uh, careful, it's, uh...

DAWN: Fragile?

D'HOFFRYN: Squirmy.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

XANDER: How do I look?

BUFFY: Well, let's see. Found your shoes... your fly's zipped. I'd say you look like you're ready to get married. You're one of the decent ones, Xander. I hope I'm as lucky as you guys someday.

XANDER: You wanna get lucky? I've still got, what, fifteen, twenty minutes?

BUFFY: Oh!... All right, into the breach with you.

XANDER: Okay, breach me.

XANDER: Now, let's go over the list one more time. Number one?

BUFFY: Don't let your dad near the bar.

XANDER: Check. Number two?

BUFFY: Don't let your mom near the bar.

XANDER: Check.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

MR. HARRIS: ...Hey, what do you say we slip in the back room and I show you my...

BUFFY: You finish that sentence and I guarantee you won't have anything to show.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

VERSION 2

ANYA: I, Anya, promise to cherish you... Ew, no, not cherish. Uh, I promise... to have sex with you whenever... I want, and, uh... uh, pledge to be your friend, and your wife, and your confidant, and your sex poodle...

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[Buffy stalling]

BUFFY: Uh, hee, sorry about that. Um... there's just gonna be a little bit of a delay.

ANYA: Why? What's wrong?

BUFFY: Nothing! Nothing's wrong, it's just, um... it... the... the minister. He had, uh... to go... and perform an emergency C-section.

ANYA: A C-section?

BUFFY: Yeah! You know, he's, uh... not... not just a minister, he's also a... a doctor. You know, he's half-minister, half-doctor, he's a... a mini-tor. Not, of course, to be confused with a minotaur! Because he's all, you know, man, this doctor minister man... no... no bull parts whatsoever.

ANYA: Uh-huh.

BUFFY: So it, it should just be a couple of minutes.

ANYA: Okay.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Version 3

ANYA: Okay. For the last time. I, Anya, want to marry you, Xander, because... I love you and I'll always love you. And... before I knew you, I was like a completely different person. Not even a person, really... and I had seen what love could do to people, and it was... hurt and sadness. Alone was better.

And then, suddenly there was you, and... you knew me. You saw me, and it was this... thing. You make me feel safe and warm. So, I get it now. I finally get love, Xander. I really do.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

ANYA: I mean, I am sorry, but what the hell is that minister thinking?

TARA: Uh, I don't know, he...

ANYA: I mean, delivering a baby! On my special day! I mean, it's totally rude of him and the mother. I mean, why couldn't he have just told her to hold it?

---------------------------------------------------------------------

And a little bit of What's-his-name.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
RILEY: Sorry to just drop in on you like this, Buffy.

BUFFY: It's you.

RILEY: It's me.

BUFFY: You're here.

RILEY: I know.

BUFFY: And... Were you always this tall?

---------------------------------------------------------------------

RILEY: We've been tear-assing through every jungle from Paraguay up, taking out nests. As soon as we put one Suvolte down, a dozen take its place. They're breeders, Buffy. One turns into ten, ten becomes a hundred. This gets out of hand and there's a war with humans? Humans are gonna lose.

BUFFY: So they're like really mean Tribbles.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

BUFFY: Nice wheels.

RILEY: Came with the car.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

RILEY: ...Got some, uh... big stories to tell you too. If we ever get half a second.

BUFFY: Did you die?

RILEY: No.

BUFFY: I'm gonna win.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

 

[Highlander II]

good quotes!!


From "All the Way"

Buffy: Didn't anyone come here just to make out?
<two 'teens' raise their hands timidly>
Buffy: Awww. How sweet. You run. <points to couple> <points to vampire> You... scream.

 

[HeyLynny]

I love it when Spike says "Balls!" It's really funny to me and my sisters because my Dad has been saying that for years and then it started to show up in movies (Lake Placid) and on TV (Ally McBeal and Buffy). Very Funny! We tell my Dad he should get royalties.

 

[Sidhe]

My fav for S6 so far....


*
*
*
*
*
* Possible Spoiler


Its from As You Were...

Spoiler

BUFFY: My hat has a cow.

::sigh:: I dunno why, but that line, in that scene, really cracks me up!

I know its not a real spoiler, but [shrug] ya never know!:blush:

 

[Shaun]

I don't know if this has been posted before but I'll post it anyway.

Jonathan: We have one more award to give out. Is Buffy Summers here tonight? Did she....um...This is actually a new category. First time ever. I guess there were a lot of write in ballots and the prom committee asked me to read this. ‘We're not good friends. Most of us never found the time to get to know you. But that doesn't mean we haven't noticed you. We don't talk about it much, but it's not secret that Sunnydale High isn't really like other high schools. A lot of weird stuff happens here.’
Student: Zombies.
Student: Hyena people.
Student: Snyder.
Jonathan: ’But whenever there was a problem or something creepy happened, you seemed to show up and stop it. Most of the people here have been saved by you. Or helped by you at one time or another. We're proud to say that the class of '99 has the lowest mortality rate of any graduating class in Sunnydale history. And we know that at least part of that is because of you. So the senior class offers it's thanks and gives you, uh... this.’ It's from all of us. And it has written here, Buffy Summers- Class Protector.

 

[HeyLynny]

My other favorite quotes (too many to list) are when...

Season Six:

Spoiler

Jonathan and his guys mention Star Wars references. And when Spike held the Boba Fett figure hostage

....that was hysterical!!!!!

 

[tokyogirl]

Know your enemies....

 

[tokyogirl]

ok, same episode:

Season Six:

Spoiler

buffy:it seems like we've been through every book.
anya:yeah, even the ones that weren't so boring you wanted to kill yourself
xander:we have those?!?