Fic: Three Leaves, Leave It Be

H_P_M

High Commander WORSHIP ME
Joined
Dec 17, 2000
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Okay so I was bored, and decided what the heck I post the story here for giggles. This is not slash so no having to worry about that ;) The only thing you have to worry about is if your a Aragorn and Leggy fan ;) thats about it if your not, you probably more then likely won't enjoy the setory as much lol.

This fic was inspired by my own bad luck, I figured hey I know who just seems to have it as well (laughs evilly)

Gene: General/Humor

Rating: PG

Summery - Its always fun until somebody gets poison ivy!

(BTW Thank you's go out for correcting are Andrea McCullough and Malinda)

Legolas Greenleaf, son of King Thranduil, grandson to the Great Oropher, was walking through the beautiful trees of Rivendell. Actually, to be more accurate, he was in a full fledged run. You would run too if you just had pulled a stunt like he had, and feared for your life. One of his pranks had just gone right and now he had an angry human after him, his long time best friend Aragorn. Don't feel bad for the poor human, he quite deserved it, for one morning Legolas had woken up to a complete horror. His hair, his beloved hair (elves take great pride in their appearance), was a dreadful color, pink! To make it worse he had words scrawled all over his face in an almost indelible ink.
Seeing it backwards made it harder to read, but some of them were so big and bold, that it was pretty clear what they said, which just happened to be things like, "Aragorn Rules," and "Girlie Elf." He sooner found out how the prank was masterminded by Aragorn who was able to get a hold of one of Lord Elrond's sleeping potions and slip it into one of his drinks. Oh how he hated to be outwitted!

The entire structure of Rivendell had been shaken by the thunderous voice of Legolas, and it was pay back time, which now brings us back to our current situation. It had worked out perfectly for the Prince of Mirkwood, which it usually did when it came to stunts like these. The best part was, he had gotten the two troublesome twin brothers, Elrohir and Elladan, to help him. They of course where always willing to pull a fast one on their little brother, it was just the way of life, not to mention their duty as older brothers.

Legolas ran past all the dense woods, not bothering to hide his tracks. It was more fun this way, listening to Aragorn as he tried to gain speed and catch up with the sure-footed elf. Really, he hadn't done anything too bad or big, or so he thought, after all, what were a few feathers and some tar to a man who didn't bathe for weeks on end out in the wilderness? And what did it matter that he pulled his prank in front of the love of his life, Arwen Undomiel. The best part was, they where just about to kiss. The only downfall, he gotten a little bit on Arwen, but it all changed for the better when she burst into a musical laughter. The look that crossed the human's face was absolute priceless. Alas, Legolas couldn't stand around and take in the scenery for he knew if he stuck around to long he wouldn't be able to enjoy his revenge because Aragorn was going to flat out kill him.

The elf wasn't even beginning to wear down from the run through the woods, but none the less after a while it began to get aggravating and boring to a certain degree. He been running for practically thirty minutes and Aragorn still didn't sound like he was giving up anytime soon. So deciding to change things a bit, Legolas picked the first likely tree and jumped into it not noticing the ivy that clenched and danced around the bark in his haste.

Soon enough the tyrant human came busting through the tree line like a heard of Oliphants and dwarfs combined. He even sounded like it as he breathed in and breathed out, his chest was taking in loads of air and sweat ran down his face. Tar and feathers still clinging on to him, desperately wanting to not let go of the human.

Aragorn, finally being able to think through the haze of breathlessness, looked around in search of the nimble elf that he had in his sights just a few seconds ago, but then Legolas just disappeared, and that only meant one thing. He had taken to the trees. Reading the ground carefully he squinted then slowly he saw the obvious clue and glanced up.

"You can't stay up there forever."

"Want to bet?"

Aragorn would have loved to climb up but there was one thing hindering this, there were no limbs to grasp onto. It was a tree that just simply went up. The human was a very good climber, but not that good.

"You'll get yours!"

"Promises, promises, of which I grow weary."

It was all in jest, a practiced tradition. They would go for a while without any pranks, then one would set it off and they go through this until either, one had to go home, or Elrond finally got angry enough that he put a stop to it, or- the one that always tended to happen, the elf or human ended up in the healing wing.

Knowing now there was nothing else he could do until the elf came down, Aragorn huffed and made his way towards the river, mumbling things under his breath the entire way.

Legolas, not wanting to stick around by himself for too long, ended up following Aragorn through the dense thicket and sanctuary of the trees. Aragorn was able to get most of the crud off of him but some still some of it stubbornly stuck, mostly in his hair.

"Cheer up Estel," Legolas snickered, "You will still look the same no matter how many times you bathe." Legolas was perched in a tree, letting one leg hang loosely and swinging it back and forth as he watched the human. Aragorn didn't know exactly where the elf was but he got a pretty good idea when he heard the words spoken, and that was where Aragorn gave his glare to, one that was pretty much the same as Lord Elrond gave.

"Glare all you want, it does not affect me."

"Yeah but I know what would."

"And what would that be?" questioned Legolas, trying to see where Aragorn was taking this line of comments.

"If I snap your pretty bow."

Legolas jumped down exactly in front of Aragorn, who had expected this and with only a small smile to give away what he was about to do, he grabbed Legolas and before the elf could stop him, threw both himself and the Prince in the river. Like a drowned rat Legolas came up, his blond locks dripping over his face until he pushed them back with his hands enabling the full effect of his fiery gaze to scorch the ranger. Then with a smug look Aragorn mockingly quipped, "Glare all you want, it does not affect me."

That's when Legolas decided to dunk the human under the water. Aragorn, of course decided to reciprocate and the game went on until they decided enough was enough and it was time to go home. The two parted ways in the hall to go to their separate rooms, Legolas stayed often enough at Rivendell that he had his very own room, in which he kept some of his own belongings. The same went for Aragorn in Mirkwood. So it was not much of a surprise when Legolas and Aragorn had done something stupid enough to almost cost them their lives, Elrond was mad enough he demanded the Prince go to his room and stay there until he was done killing his adopted child, Aragorn. Of course he had to listen, for if he didn't, Elrond would be sure to mention to King Thranduil, and that only meant bad news for Legolas, so he listened to the elder elf.

Closing the door to his room Legolas sighed, tiredness was slowly creeping up and he was ready for the nice warm bed that was whispering his name.
Doing his normal routine before calling it a night, he brushed his hair and with lazy eyes he didn't even catch the tiny red dots on his hand or on his neck. Turning the light off, he was asleep in no time.

Legolas woke up to the peaceful sounds of Rivendell, with the small chirping of some birds outside his window and a very strange thing, his hand was scratching at his neck. He took his hand away and looked at it almost expecting to find something there. Like most elves, he did not generally move around while sleeping, yet his neck felt like he been going at it all night long. Shrugging he didn't really think much of it. He didn't even glance in the mirror as he tied his warrior braids behind him, his hands knowing the exact movements it required without having to even look at it to know if it was perfect. He then left his room to go eat the morning meal.

When he walked into the dining room, the hall was alive with the activity of people getting the food onto the table. He was jerked sharply out of his thoughts when a plate crashed to the floor. He glanced up to see that everybody was staring at him.

"What?"

Then something came to Legolas' mind, and he grabbed his hair to see if it was another color, but it was still blond. He wondered what could be causing the kind of looks he was receiving so he asked again.

"What is it?"

"Your," Elrohir tried getting out but all he could do was point while his mouth hung open.

"My what?" Asked Legolas to see if he could provoke something from anyone, but once again everybody was speechless. Legolas was about to give up and go look for himself but Aragorn walked in and immediately noticed the distress and Legolas' face.

"Legolas?"

"Yes?"

"What is all over your face?...is that..." but he couldn't get the words out, all he could do was stare. Glancing back and forth between everyone Legolas breathed in deeply then looked into his plate and just about screamed. His face, his neck, was entirely covered in angry red blotches of rashes and bumps. Just looking at them started a chain reaction of itching and they all were screaming to be scratched!

Glorfindel walked in and was about to say good morning when he noticed the Prince and his ugly rash, for even if Legolas tried to attempt to hide it he couldn't with the pale skin of his, it just stood out ten times worse.

"What did you do to yourself?"

Legolas rolled his eyes and was about to make a comment but Lord Elrond walked into the room and made his way towards the head of the table.

"You are all awfully..." He was going to say how quiet the group was being, for they were never known for their silence. He glanced around to make sure everything was all right. Aragorn was fine, as well as Legolas with his, he stopped then walked up towards Legolas and taking his chin is his hand.

"Valar, Legolas!" He was going to ask him what happened but then he thought more of it and let go of the Prince's chin and gave Aragorn his famous gaze, for he immediately assumed another prank had been pulled. The human threw up his hands in defense, and said as he pointed towards Legolas, "I had nothing to do with it this time, it's all Legolas' doing."

Turning back to his plate, Legolas was now silently taking in his features that could even scare an orc away, or so he surmised.

Turning back to his plate, Legolas was now silently taking his features that could even scare an orc away, or at the moment that's how he felt. Knowing his luck they'd think he was attractive with all the red spots decorating his features, Legolas shivered inwardly on that one.

"Well then, what is it?" Legolas was finally able to get out, holding the plate farther back to see how bad it truly was.

"Well my dear Prince, it looks like you ran into a poison ivy patch, or maybe poison oak."

"What do you mean ran, he looks like he rolled in it!" Aragorn chortled.

The group became even quieter then as it registered that an elf, whom of all creatures on Middle Earth knew the most about the flora had gotten himself bathed in poison ivy. The entire group burst into laughter, minus Legolas, who didn't find it humorous one bit. Even Lord Elrond had a small smirk curved on his lips. Everybody laughed even harder when Elladen walked in and pointed at Legolas, who in return was not giving a very happy look when Elladen made the comment, "What's with the rash Legolas?"

Legolas sat on the bed as Elrond was asking him where did he think he may have contracted it, where else was it itching and on and on and on. He had made sure nobody but Elrond was allowed into the room. Everyone was still laughing at him even after he left. He had been ready to vanish into the trees when he heard Lord Elrond behind him commanding him to go the healing wing to be examined. So here he was, in the healing ward where he really didn't want to be.

"Well I m afraid your going to be itching for a while, but I don't want you to scratch, this stuff can spread pretty badly if you're not careful. I have some ointment I want you to rub on your skin whenever it itches and it should take care of that for a while." Elrond was handing the stuff to Legolas, who was looking out the window wishing he was outside. It was like he was an elfling again, with a badly broken arm who was forbidden to go outside until it healed properly.
"Don't think about going outside Greenleaf, I don't want you getting more on you."

"I'm not going to."

One spot on his neck started to irritate him so his hand came up to scratch at it, Elrond slapped at it.

"Stop, use this, remember?" He put a bottle in Legolas' hand. Legolas sighed heavily and put some of it on the spot that was trying to get his attention by irritating him to extreme lengths, and as soon as he put that on another spot started to yell for it as well.

"I'll go get you something to drink, I'll be right back, keep putting it on." When the door shut Legolas got madder the longer he sat there, for with every itch seemed to intensified his anger until he just finally took it out on the ointment and threw it across the room which bounced off the entry door. It was considered childish to be throwing that kind of tantrum but he was in such a foul mood he could not care less who thought what.

The door opened a crack and Aragorn's head popped in. "Hey itchy."

Legolas shot him a glare, then let his eyes rest on the window.

"See what happened Legolas, I warned you, it would be coming to you."

"If you say any more, I'm going to make sure you get this with me."

"I'm a ranger Legolas, I know better, I would say the same thing if I were an elf but you proved that to be false."

One of the cups that had been sitting on the nightstand next to Legolas came flying at Aragorn but he ducked in the nick of time. Legolas soon was itching again as though throwing something provoked the attack of the poison ivy itch.

Elrond walked into the room holding one of his famous teas. Everybody knew, if you let him give you a drink you were sure to fall asleep from the droughts he puts in them. Legolas, the twins, and Aragorn where convinced that, if given the chance, Elrond be serving them all the time just to keep them quiet and out of trouble.

"Get out Aragorn, he doesn't need you harassing him."

"Okay," Aragorn raised his eyebrows and had a small smile on his face, "Have fun."

Elrond shook his head as the door shut and then he noticed the bottle that was lying on the floor.

"Now, how did that get there?" Arching a previously straight line of an eyebrow, Legolas shrugged.

"If you want me to start treating you like a elfling, little Greenleaf, I will, by first strapping you down to the bed to make sure you won't do one of your famous disappearing acts." He handed Legolas the cup.

"Don t worry I'll drink it." Legolas tried to sound convincing enough but he knew he wasn't fooling anybody.

"I think I'll wait."

Knowing there was truly no escape unless he jumped out the window, which he knew would be a bit silly though it would save him from having to sleep. Legolas finally did gave in and drank the liquid in the cup and gave it back to the Lord of Rivendell.

"Good, that should stop your scratching for a while."

Legolas could feel the effects of the sleeping drought hit his body hard, and when he looked at Lord Elrond he could have sworn that he was smiling as though he was enjoying this. The last thought the prince had was that he was going to make sure that Aragorn had to suffer with him.

Elrond saw the young elf's eyes fall down slowly. He knew it would knock him out completely if it cause the eyelids to close like that. He at least had a reason to keep the prince in doors and not out terrorizing something, or himself for that matter, with sickness. He always wished the day would never come when he would have to tell Legolas' father his son had died because the elf didn't have brains of an orc. He knew he would probably be going to Mandos with Legolas for the King wasn't known for having a good temper.

Leaning down, he picked up the medicine and put it near Legolas then left the room.

Legolas woke up groggily and felt his hand scratching under his light tunic. When he realized he stopped immediately. He rubbed his eyes with the back of his palm to make sure he didn't get the rash in them, then he got up and walked over to the mirror. He thought he looked bad yesterday! The spots had worsened in color and were in bigger blotches. When he lifted his shirt up there were specks dotted here and there. It took all of his will power not to hit the mirror.

Glancing out the window he noticed that night was just falling, he had slept the entire day away thanks to Elrond. He grabbed the medicine and began trying to rub it onto every single spot, but it was like a chess game. He'd get one spot and then have to move again and then before he knew it he was coming back to one that had all ready got the coating of the medicine but was still itchy and needed more. Finally he just gave up and put it down.

As he looked at it intently a plan formed in his head. A very evil one and he couldn't help but smirk at the idea. It wouldn't be hard to get the right materials. Aragorn and the twins were going to pay for their laughter, for if Legolas Greenleaf had to suffer then by all means everybody had to suffer with him.

Grabbing a bag and his identical blades he then carefully climbed out the window and made sure no one had spotted him or was following him. He then made his way towards the forest.

He hadn't realized how far he had run from Aragorn that previous afternoon, and now in the dark it was a bit harder to rediscover it but he had an idea of where he contracted the poison ivy and before too long he found it. Smirking he took out his blades and carefully and delicately collected the planet that had been a thorn in his side but ironically would help him out in the end.

Legolas made his way back to the house of Rivendell and he could only imagine how much fun it was going to be to see them squirm.

(Next Day)

Legolas woke up with a big smile on his face. Nobody had suspected a thing, nobody woke up as he was bringing his master mind plan together.

As he walked towards the dinning area a beautiful voice rang in his ears, actually two identical ones.

"LEGOLASSSSSSS!"

Of course Legolas had to make sure he disappeared for the entire day, or at least until Elrond knocked them out, he knew that the elder elf would be more then happy to. Those two were worse then Legolas was ever, or that's how he saw it. The best part was, Aragorn was laughing the entire time not expecting a thing. Legolas, knowing what was to come just sat back and waited for the next day to roll in.

When it did come and Aragorn woke up to his own surprise, Legolas was pretty happy with his work for the human received the worse out of the three of them. He took even longer to recover from it, but then again Legolas thought, nobody laughed at him and got away with it.

The End
 
heheh glad you liked it :D and thought it was fun. Believe me I took that from my own experience and that wasn't so much fun. They actually said it was the worst epedmic in a long time. To think all I wanted to do was set off some illegal fireworks and drink under age (sigh) guess I got payed back for it ;) lol anyways thanks for your review, I appreciate it :D
 

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