Alien delicacies

Discussion in 'SFF Lounge' started by Tommy Brauer, Apr 1, 2017.

  1. Tommy Brauer

    Tommy Brauer Member

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    I often wonder such things like which alien species would love the taste and consistency of human ears....its like eating pickled pigs feet or something....

    Alien one: Have you ever had a pickled human ear?
    Alien two: Omg... my favorite *drools*
    Alien one: I heard we just had a good harvest from Epsilon one, wanna go get lunch?
    Alien two: I dunno slug, they are expensive...
    Alien one: I'll buy.
    Alien two: Deal.


    ----
    Later that day
    ----

    Mike: Hey George. Oh man! They got you too?
    George: Yeah... i asked them not to do it, but u know it is.. those sluggos...
    Mike: *laughs* yeah... they can be pretty insistent.
    George: at least they use the hypo spray to stop the bleeding and the pain immediately
    Mike: Huh? *pretends he cant hear*
    *Mike and George laugh together.*
    George: Good one bro. Lets go eat some shrimp.
     
    Last edited: Apr 1, 2017
  2. dannymcg

    dannymcg Raoul Mitgong won't help

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    But afterwards wouldn't they keep bumping into things?
     
  3. Tommy Brauer

    Tommy Brauer Member

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    Hmmm maybe.

    On another forum we had this conversation shortly after i posted this.

    An old friend:
    Over-sized aliens sit on the sofa watching movies munching on a big bowl of buttered human babies.

    Whats on the snack tray?
    > French Fried Esophagus
    > Human butter & jelly petite fours
    > Smoked back strips
    > Toasted skull caps with picked brain filling
    > Hands & feet candied crunch
    > Lung Crisps
    > Crispy Fried Kidneys
    > Hot BBQ necks


    "Oh I love it when I get a bag of mostly pregnant females."
    "They pop when you bite em and then you get a surprise morsel of goodness!"
    "I really like the cute little noises they make right before you bite them."

    "Yeah, but I kinda love that wonderful aroma the fermented ones get after they sit in the bag for a few weeks." "Such Slurpy Goodness!"

    "Ever get a squirmy one?"
    "Oh wow, yeah! I love how they squirm all the way in till you bite down."

    "Hey, I heard Kornk was looking to open a snack stand, Planning to go get fresh ones from Earth and everything." "Gunna offer peeled and unpeeled."

    "Kornk is awesome!"
     
  4. Tommy Brauer

    Tommy Brauer Member

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    Me:
    OMG you are so awesome sir!!!
    This is beautiful.

    Mmmm crunchy.

    I like to suck on their fingers and toes before biting down, so much flavor.

    Yeah i know right? Like who would have thought sucking the brains through the eye sockets could be so amazing????

    Yeah, the little screech they make before they finally go limp.

    The legs are pretty good depending on how fat it is. A little rubbery if you get em too skinny though.

    Oh yeah, you gotta get the chubby ones, nice and fluffy.
     
  5. Tommy Brauer

    Tommy Brauer Member

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    It's a bit excessive in the department of grotesque... but its probably a conversation heard a trillion times a year across the cosmos.

    i'm almost positive there will be more conversation:
    Alien delicacies https://aliensoup.com
     
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  6. dannymcg

    dannymcg Raoul Mitgong won't help

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    Well done! You resisted asking the obvious and thus avoided my hackneyed trap
     
  7. Tommy Brauer

    Tommy Brauer Member

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    i was slightly intoxicated the other night sorry. i think the inner ear fluids have to deal with balance, i mean, there's always possible implants in the future to correct if they really pull the inner ear out with it, but i honestly just though the outer ear cartilage would be on the menu. you cant spoil your favorite foods from being able to be active and fornicate to reproduce more can you? XD
     
  8. dannymcg

    dannymcg Raoul Mitgong won't help

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    Insane but amusing!
     
  9. Ursa major

    Ursa major Bearly Believable Staff Member

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    Looks like we may have to keep an ear out for the approach of hungry aliens....
     
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  10. dannymcg

    dannymcg Raoul Mitgong won't help

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    No ears - therefore their spectacles would keep falling off and thus they'd bump into things (I try, I really do. Some would say much too hard!)
     
  11. Tommy Brauer

    Tommy Brauer Member

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    as soon as they land i'm investing in geordi laforge visor companies
     
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  12. Old_Man_Steve2016

    Old_Man_Steve2016 Well-Known Member

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    This reminds me of the Teen Titans. Starfire always ate some strange stuff. I always wondered why the team never died from eating the wrong stereoisomer of amino acids.
    [​IMG]
    Reminds me of my wife's probiotic shakes, just about the same color, too.

    [​IMG]

    Don't think Tabasco can make whatever that is edible.
     
  13. dannymcg

    dannymcg Raoul Mitgong won't help

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    Grottled meeps?
    I've read that somewhere, little sand lobster things that you skin alive with a 'grottling fork' and eat them while they're still twitching.
    Some sci fi book but can't think
     
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