Worst book covers

[Venusian Broon]

And the only mystery here is how this publication lasted thirty-one issues.

Is it possible because they spill the beans on what the mystery is on the front cover. Hardly makes it a mystery any more. Perhaps they should have called it 'House of the very quickly known' ?

Not keen on the fashion either, sort of Robin Hood Leprechaun.

Having taken the pee a little at them for that, I am now intrigued by what the 'uncanny creatures of Carl Griffin!' are. See that's a real mystery...

 

[HareBrain]

I am now intrigued by what the 'uncanny creatures of Carl Griffin!' are. See that's a real mystery...

Given the quality of the imagination in evidence elsewhere on the cover, I wouldn't be altogether surprised if it turned out to be some kind of lion/eagle combo.

 

[Curt Chiarelli]

Is it possible because they spill the beans on what the mystery is on the front cover. Hardly makes it a mystery any more. Perhaps they should have called it 'House of the very quickly known' ?

Not keen on the fashion either, sort of Robin Hood Leprechaun.

Having taken the pee a little at them for that, I am now intrigued by what the 'uncanny creatures of Carl Griffin!' are. See that's a real mystery...

Building the suspense and then blowing the secret before the reader even has a chance to crack open the cover is always your assurance of quality writing.

And as far as fashion sense goes, can you really trust anyone who dresses like a Keebler elf?

Now, for the first time on the worldwide web, see the dark mystery surrounding Carl Griffin's Uncanny Creatures exposed in my reply to HareBrain's post . . . .

 

[Curt Chiarelli]

Given the quality of the imagination in evidence elsewhere on the cover, I wouldn't be altogether surprised if it turned out to be some kind of lion/eagle combo.

This is Carl Griffin. Carl Griffin has an uncanny problem. Carl Griffin has tapeworms.

 

[Ray McCarthy]

People used to DELIBERATELY get tapeworms!

 

[Chris Guillory]

Jaded Robin Hood stunt doubles happen across a magic wand, and abuse their new found powers to deface trees in the local park. Lilia, the ever faithful wife and devout Flash Gordon Cosplayer, is the only one who can stop her power-drunk husband.

 

[Ray McCarthy]

Think how many Dryads he has thoughtlessly slain!

 

[Curt Chiarelli]

People used to DELIBERATELY get tapeworms!

Yes, it's the aristocratic way to keep that slender figure while defying the landlord's no-pets-in-the-apartment policy.

 

[Curt Chiarelli]

So who did the art direction on this edition of Roald Dahl's Charlie and the Chocolate Facory? Clare Quilty?

 

[Chris Guillory]

I don't care what anyone says, postmortem photography is creepy.

 

[Ray McCarthy]

There was quite storm about that new cover, Pedo/Porno. Did they withdraw it yet? I think certainly in poor taste. Innocent child that I am, I didn't know who Clare Quilty was. The reference is probably apt, even though Clare Quilty was not a book cover designer.

 

[Curt Chiarelli]

I don't care what anyone says, postmortem photography is creepy.

Yes, but they've improved it greatly since then. Look at what they've been able to do for Vladimir Lenin, Nancy Reagan and Dick Cheney. Wonderfully lifelike, you'd swear they weren't something wheeled out of Madame Tussaud's.

 

[Curt Chiarelli]

There was quite storm about that new cover, Pedo/Porno. Did they withdraw it yet? I think certainly in poor taste. Innocent child that I am, I didn't know who Clare Quilty was. The reference is probably apt, even though Clare Quilty was not a book cover designer.

Nothing quite like introducing a bit of the inappropriate or the tacky and trashy to help boost the sales of a hoary old classic, eh?

By the way, Clare Quilty is a fictional character in Vladimir Nabokov's novel, Lolita. In the book he was a child pornographer, a revolting creep of the lowest order.

 

[thaddeus6th]

Aye, that cover is bloody dodgy.

Some reckon it was done to try and get coverage for a book which everyone's already heard about. In that sense, it certainly worked.

 

[Ray McCarthy]

a revolting creep of the lowest order

So I discovered. It's not a book that's ever been on my reading list either.

 

[Vince W]

I came across this. Seems appropriate here:

 

[J-Sun]

Wow. Just. Wow. That may take the prize. Can't Donner and Blitzen there help old St. Nick out by spearing Mr. Yeti with their antlers? Cuz it's the killer kandy kanes that I think are the most amazing aspect of that generally amazing bit of... whatever. Though Prancer howling at the moon like a reinwolf is puzzling. And the text is of a piece with the painting. And...

I came across this. Seems appropriate here:

Is there anywhere else it would be appropriate?

 

[Alex The G and T]

Looks like an entry for the December 75 word challenge!

 

[Curt Chiarelli]

Just when I thought Santa Versus the Martians and Silent Night, Deadly Night were the final words on tasteless pop culture ephemera, this comes along . . . . So, why not pull out all the stops and show the Yeti munching on a terrified elf too? Besides, all that white in the composition needs a little punching up with geysers of bright, oxygenated blood. And speaking of a lack of red, it's pretty obvious the Yeti isn't dying of blood loss, in spite of all candy canes he's been stabbed with. Far more likely, he'll be expiring from insulin shock.

 

[Remedy]

See this one below - How was any of this ever allowed to be "OK" ??? Was the extra swastika in the top right really necessary? Who is this art directed at?