A new version of the Star Wars prequels

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McFlabbergasty

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Ever since The Phantom Menace I've always wished that the Star Wars prequels were never put into Lucas's hands...at all. In any way.That being said, the prequels lacked the tone, atmosphere, scripting, acting, and symbolism that I was expecting of a predecessor trilogy to the greatest space opera films of all time.

I'm sure that this is a pure wish-fulfillment fantasy on my part, but I would love to see an improvement over the existing PT get made someday... perhaps by an independent filmmaker with a deeper pocket than most independent filmmakers; someone who knows how to inject the elements listed previously into a story of redemption and revenge in deep space.
The beginning of Star Wars Episode I: Rise of the Witch

Twenty-five years before the destruction of the Death Star at the hands of Luke Skywalker, the Republic is in a state of turmoil. The state has been under attack by a group of anti-Human movements known as the League. Their leader is a mysterious figure known to most as "the Witch". It is rumored that she can use the Force, an energy field generated by and connecting all life in the galaxy. The only other known Force-sensitives in the galaxy are the Jedi Order, an independent group of peacekeepers based on a starship called the Ark of the Jedi. Yoda is the current captain and five other Jedi Knights and Masters are his sub-ordinates.

The plot is kicked off with an attack on Coruscant by a fleet of League starships, all of which are former Republic ships refashioned and refitted with different weaponry. In the ensuing space battle, many lives on both sides are brought to a fiery end. The Ark of the Jedi joins the battle and Anakin Skywalker uses his piloting skills to shoot down League gunships that were targeting General Palpatine's cruiser. However, a landing party of League marines successfully captures Antior, Chancellor of the Republic, and brings him on-board a League destroyer. The remaining fleet turns about and escapes into hyperspace.

The violent debacle allows Palpatine to become Acting Chancellor for the duration of the new conflict, dubbed the Clone Wars because of reports of cloned warriors being used to capture Antior. Palpatine immediately calls out the Jedi on not being able to prevent the capture of Antior, even subtly insinuating that the Jedi were conspiring with the League.

Senator Bail Organa is assisted by Obi-Wan Kenobi in arguing with Palpatine against the Acting Chancellor's new xenophobic policies. Aliens in the Senate will be made sub-ordinate to Human political officers and aliens cannot fight in the Republic military without intense scrutiny, in addition to not being able to serve in the newly-formed Republic Storm Division. Palpatine insists that these are protective measures, but Obi-Wan and Bail see differently. Palpatine insists upon Obi-Wan that the Ark be made an official vessel of the Republic Navy. Obi-Wan replies that the Jedi only hold loyalty to order and peacekeeping.

Palpatine dismisses Bail and Obi-Wan. The two are joined by Anakin, having just recovered aboard the Ark. Obi-Wan gives Anakin an assignment from Yoda: train the new Force-sensitive named Cael in the ways of the Jedi. Anakin is to meet Cael on Cael's smuggler transport, the Belisarion. Bail responds warmly when he hears of the Belisarion; he was a long-time friend of the ship's navigator Jeni Lars. Bail leaves shortly after, telling Anakin to give Jeni his best regards.

Anakin expresses a desire, not unlike Palpatine, to see the Ark integrated into the Republic Navy, but Obi-Wan insists that that would sully the Jedi's name of being an unaffiliated peacekeeping order. Obi-Wan tells Anakin of the connection between the Witch and the Jedi who had defected to the dark ways of the Force several years ago: they are one and the same. Anakin ruminates on this fact as he departs for his Jedi starfighter. . .
 
Welcome to the Chronicles, McFlabbergasty.

Unfortunately, I have had to lock this thread. There are three reasons for this: 1) As the rules above state, you may not post a piece of your writing in the Critiques section without first accumulating 30 posts. 2) We don't do fan fiction here. 3) It is unclear whether you are actually asking for a critique.

If you have something else on which you would like to receive feedback, please read the Guidelines first. http://www.sffchronicles.co.uk/forum/527567-please-read-before-posting-rules-and-guidelines-for.html And before you do post something else, look around the forums, see what interests you, and begin to take an active part in the community. We'd like to get to know you. This will naturally bring you up to the necessary number of posts, familiarize you with our methods of asking for and receiving critiques, and you won't find yourself going to the effort of posting something in this part of the forums only to see it locked again.
 
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