Ok, that is kind of what I was thinking too. What I was going for was that in the future, humanity is managed by AI and robotics, who have replaced humanity in most jobs. Carl is one of the few humans who are able to do a certain job better than a machine, but the rest are Obsoletes, who eke out a living any way possible. Compassion, in this case, is the same as rebellion from the "guiding" of the machines, and is punishable with death.@Joshua Jones --- as you said; your story did get several mentions and in my book that's a pretty good month. Votes are hard to come by especially when one story gets nearly a third of them.
I found your story hard to follow. First the title put me off. I don't know what I was dreaming about but it was not until I tried to understand what did not put your story up there for me that I realized 2157 was probably a date. I had it in my mind that it was somehow related to your story and could not imagine what that relation was. My bad! --- Second, I was confused by the terminology of "Obsolete." I first thought that it was a statement of being out of date, but then we came to the "Obsolete bandits" which might be a group name and so the term might be group designation. --- Third, this sentence didn't make sense to me. "Carl froze, but couldn't turn away from the pleas for help, the Osolete bandits, and spilt blood." What is "Obsolete bandits" doing in this sentence? Did Carl spill his own blood? That does not seem to make sense in the story, but that is the obvious way to read the sentence. Fourth, "illegal thought pattern" does not obviously make sense to me if we are talking about something that is "obsolete" now if the "Obsolete bandits" is some kind of gang, then it does. But since bandits is not capitalized I was not at all sure that it was a group. Finally, and perhaps as an overarching concern, I did not understand the context. Is everyone on a slideway (this was my thought)? Why is Obsolete a death offense? Where are the people going? What are they doing? I did not understand an answer to any of those questions.
Now that I've really concentrated on this story, I'm coming to the opinion that you attempted too much in this story to be able to carry it out in 85 words.
So, the way I saw the storyline going, Carl was on his way to work at the direction of his Guide, and saw his brother being attacked by a group of bandits. He wanted to intervene, but the Guide wouldn't allow this inefficiency. When he refused the Guide's direct order, he was in rebellion, and the Guide destroyed him and three Obsoletes who happened to be near him. But, yeah, if that is capable of being presented in 85 words, I don't think I did a particularly good job of doing it.