Comic book characters in Dune!

mutate

Science fiction fantasy
Joined
Feb 9, 2009
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8
I saw this fan fic thread on another forum and it made me laugh!

Paul led Stilgar along the stone corridor of the sietch untill the reached the room containing the icy glass cryo chamber with the black haired warrior inside.

"He has been sleeping in there for thousands of years" Paul said. "Frozen by his allies after an injury which they were not yet advanced enough to heal. I have followed my ancestral memories to trace his long-lost body and bring it here."

Stilgar was aghast. The waste of water! But Paul had promised that the individual contained therin would be a valuabe asset to the Sietch.

"The man was a fighter of injustice on his own world, a long time ago. In those days, humans did not have the level of training and focus we have now, but this man was an exception. He reached such perfection, he was almost a precursor to the Bene Gesserit. He was ahead of his time, and like me he created a superhuman persona to frighten his enemies."

Baron Harkonnen was troubled by the recent reports from his troops. This "desert bat", this invincible creature who had been sweeping upon many of his most vital operations in a series of stealth attacks, never killing but always creating irreparable damage. It must be simple trickery from Muad'dib. His men were babbling about an evil spirit, but some of the more level headed maintainted it was simply a fremen wearing a stillsuit fitted with a frightening face and bat-like ears, particularly well trained in the wierding way. The Baron preferred to take a realistic view of such things.

Suddenly, he realised that his chamber had fallen deathly quiet. He looked around, feeling a growing worry pass over his normally relaxed, rotund, floating body. Both his personal guards were lying unconsious on either side. As the huge shadow fell from behing he looked round, piggy eyes wide with terror.

It was a shaken man that his attendants found, his huge body cowering on the floor. Whatever the Bat had said to him, it created a lasting impression. This terrifying new enemy had made his mark.
The Baron quickly consulted his twisted mental Piter after his "encounter" with the Bat Man which called himself a friend of Muad'dib.

"Piter, I want you to find out who this desert bat is and where he came from!" The Baron screamed as he sipped on a drink of freshly crushed bat.

"My Baron." Piter said with a shrill voice. " I have already found out that this man is but a mere mortal from ancient times and even better I have located the cryo chambers of his arch enemy, the Joker."

The Joker long ago had been defeated by the Bat and had decided it was in his best interest to be put on ice. Now Piter had brought the Joker literally back from the dead and had trained the Joker as a twisted mentat as well the latest fighting techiques. In fact, even Piter was surprised at the level of evil and cunning that the Joker had demonstrated and the eagerness he had to learn all about the Empire, the spice and especially Muad'dib.

Suddenly, the Joker approached both the Baron and Piter and in a blur he had Piter sprawled on the floor with his neck twisted at an obscene angle.

"You won't be needing Piter, anymore" The Joker chortled. "The fool taught me everythying he knew and the only thing I hate more than Batman now is this Muad'dib who calls himself a friend of the Bat.

"You must help me defeat both this desert bat and Muad'dib who are destroying my spice production" the Baron said.

"Don't worry, my sweet, sweet Baron" the Joker icily replied. " I already have a plan.. . "

Kal El was brooding on New Krypton. Tne Kryptonains had no need of Spice, with their powers. However, they had stayed secluded from the rest of the universe, fearing that their abilities might upset the delicate balance of power and create too many variables, pushing people toward war.

However things on Arrakeen had gotton out of control. Kal El could not do nothing while Beast Rabban treated people so badly so SUPERMAN must return again. However even a Kryptonian needs water to survive, so he set to work converting his old DC costume into a stillsuit.

Meanwhile back at the sietch Paul was thawing out his newest frozen ally.

"I realize that the USA no longer exists" said Steve Rogers. "However your Fremen have the same qualities I always prided in the States - self-sufficency, individuality, bravery, and freedom."

Thus ..CAPTAIN AMERICA joined the Fremen.


"My Baron" The Joker icily replied, "They have fallen for our trap"

Gleefully the Joker explained to the Baron how they had first found Captain American in a cryogenic state and had secretely replaced him with a ghola, which had false memories implanted, The Joker explained that Superman was in the habit of snorting spice and this ghola was programmed to mix a deadly dose of kryptonite in Superman's spice stash.

"Joker, you have surpassed my wildest expectations and have proven to me 100 times as valuable as Piter" The Baron said as he wiped his fat chin after eating a bucket of greasy fried bat. . .

On New Krypton, Superman was scolded by his peers for allowing himself to become addicted to spice. Although he had no need for the geriatric effects he had to consume increasingly massive amounts of spice to even get a mild sense of euphoria. In fact, although Bat Man and Muad'dib were responsible for the Baron having difficulty meeting his spice production, Superman was also raiding the Baron's spice production in order to fuel his ever increasing addiction.

. . . Meanwhile back on Arrakis, Captain America, the ghola, locates Superman's secret spice hoard and laces his supply with a deadly form of kryptonite that does not become active until entering the bloodstream.. .

"Welcome back Superman," the ghola nervously states, "I have prepared your stash and made two monster lines just how you like it."

"Thank's old chum," Superman replied as he thought to himself that this would be the last time he would partake of the spice which so many throughout the emprie had become addicted.

However upon hearing the old familiar phrase "Old Chum" the ghola experienced a strange sensation of being a marrionette played by invisible strings. Suddenly the ghola saw a blazing light and his original true memories where fully restored.

In a blur, Captain America flung his star spangled shield towards Superman as he was about to inhale the poison ..
 

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