What is the Effective way to write a vampire vs vampire fighting scene?

[blairWitcher]

Hi. I just wanna ask you guys about the effective way of writing/describing a vampire vs vampire fighting scene that doesn't neglect both character's inner demons and feelings while at the same time indulging the reader's imagination of a wall-shattering, bloodcurdling brawl between two powerful and sinister beings?

I really need all the help you can give me on this because I plan to incorporate any idea you can give me to my first Vampire story "DARIUS BLOOD".

Have a nice day!

 

[New Ray Tech]

I'm not good at fights, but the one that wins will have silver fillings in his teeth

 

[sloweye]

Well, in most stories theyy have alot more strenght than humans and are less likely to susstaine physical injury. so i would say a show of such is a good idea, stuff like denting walls, breaking Furniture and the like. the words Epic battle seems to come to mind. things like throwing each other unrealistic distances, and a kind of relentless battle, like the fight in the mall in Terminator 2.

Like at the end of this clip. YouTube - TERMINATOR 2: JUDGMENT DAY - The Galleria (HD)

 

[flynx]

Given the hideous strength of vampires, their morphic abilities and general undeadedness it seems you're left with a Highlander type scenario: trying to cut each others head off.

 

[Nik]

Project Lorraine Chapter # 30: Rogue Bane.

"Little Sapling ?"
The tone alone could start a fight.
I spun to a defensive stance, "Who wants to know ?"
A naked Vamp stepped from the shadowed cross-passage. He was alone. His expression was some-where between snarl and sneer. The blotchy pink on his right arm told me this was 3rd Nub.
"Time to die, Little Sapling !"
"Too kind !" I grinned, yelled, "HELP !"
He flinched from my bellow, hesitated, Glamoured up. Our eyes met. His widened with surprise.
"Boo !" I smiled.
He Rushed me.

I can't out-react a Vamp any more than I'd out-run a lion. But I can anticipate. I stepped into the charge, raising an arm as if for a feeble block. Then I fell back, slapped down, a leg rising. He ran on to it, swan-dived across me, struck the wall hard.

That crash would stun most HomoSaps, but HomoVamps are tough. He picked himself up, shook his head, spat blood and teeth. I grinned. If he'd read the Greek Classics, he would have known to swallow that evidence, lest it encourage me.

"HELP !" I yelled again, improving my long-term chances, but reminding him. He turned, blinked at me like a boxer who'd taken a slow count, "No tricks this time, Sapling..."

He came at me slower. I feinted, caught at his arm, twisted and pulled. He went over my hip and landed heavily.
"HELP !" I yelled, "HELP !"
He got to his knees, shook blood from his face, stood, "Nowhere to hide now..."
"HELP !" I yelled.
He took one step, two, flew at me. I parried his first strike at my throat, blocked a flurry of slashing blows. He recoiled, "Why don't you bleed ?"
"HELLLLP !"

"I will tear out your tongue !" He snarled, grappled. He clawed at my back, bit at my face. I had my hands up. I clung to his face, held his jaws away. He was trying to push me off balance, but I'd a wall to my back. He brought up a knee, thudded into my 'box'. We danced. I got a heel behind his.

We went down hard, him first. No time for holds. My fore-arm dropped my weight across his throat. He gagged. We struggled. He flailed. His left hand crossed my face, clawed at my eyes. I bit it, clamped down for my life. He howled as my fake fangs hit, instincts expecting venom that I lacked.

I had one more trick. He was nude. I had his left hand, if briefly. I caught at his right with my left. I pinned his legs open with mine for a long moment. I jammed my right hand into his genital slit and clawed upwards. He shrieked, convulsed. It threw me off. He staggered to his feet, blood dripping from his face, his hand, his crotch. He took an unsteady step towards my heap, hesitated, stumbled back into the shadowed cross-passage.
---/quote

FWIW, these Vampires don't transmogrifly. Chris is human, but disguised as a HomoVamp for 'cultural immersion' during a 'student exchange'. His body-suit is stab-resistant...

 

[blairWitcher]

thanks guys!

I really do appreciate your comments. I also wish if you could give me the appropriate writing style for this scene. I wish to write this scene from a first person point of view. I also wish to bring out in this scene, the emotions of both the protagonist and the antagonist. Btw, I just want you guys to comment about this idea too.

I wish to design this scene similar to a DEVIL MAY CRY fighting scene (swordfight combined with guns, but unrefined and brutish; bricks and debris flying in the air; crashes and thuds at point blank... that sort of thing) would that be ok?

pls feel free to comment.

 

[mygoditsraining]

I always liked the Terminator versus Terminator fight scenes, to refer back to Sloweye's comment - especially the dispassionate glare both robots lapse into as they pound each other about relentlessly trying to cause enough damage to shut the other down. Sadly they don't have nearly enough of that in the tv series but I guess there's a budgetary constraint. That said, I could watch Summer Glau throw herself around all day and never tire of it.

But I digress.

I think trying to focus on action and feelings and wholesale destruction and struggling with inner demons and all of that for both characters would be a nightmare - my suggestion is to write a pure action scene, then rewrite it as a pure inner voice scene and pick the better one; then you can use the other to insert lines that give the flavour of the "missing" portions but don't slow the whole thing down to an absolute crawl.

 

[Nik]

IMHO, the really hard part is sentence structure. Gotta flow FAST. Can't spare time for complex construction, introspection must fit in the cracks...

You would not believe how long it took to whittle PL's crucial tussle to what's above: Bit like writing tight verse, IMHO, there's no margin, every syllable weighs...
---

( FWIW, I wrote core of this scene around Ch#07, thinking it would form novellette's finale at, perhaps, #10 or #12. Between writing the rest of the tale, I tweaked and edited, sharpened and polished obsessively. By the time I got to, uh, #27, I realised the end was receding faster than I could write. I cut to the chase... )

 

[sloweye]

With the Terminator thing i was refering to the relentless way the go at each other, you have to concider that Vamps would know that they can cause pain to each other and would be quite gleeful about it, obviously if it were a to the death battle a staking or beheading would have to end it, this would be best as a sudden end to the fight. i would say that as they are evil the bad vamp should have tha upper hand for near all the fight and the good vamp should be the underdog and just have the oppotunity after being bashed and beaten to end it.
You know the kind of thing, Broken chair leg through the heart as he is rushed by the other Vamp, or shard of glass from a broken window to take of his head.

 

[Saeltari]

Check out Charlie Huston's vampire series for ideas on gritty vampires and fighting, might give you some ideas.

 

[flynx]

As an afterthought I'd like to point you towards Kurusawa's "The Seven Samurai" (re-made for the west as "The Magnificent Seven"

The scene I'm thinking of is the one where the recruiting guy hears about a particular samurai in the district and witnesses his fight with some other guy.

After a really gigantic build-up (if I remember correctly) the baddy attacks the samurai with lots of shouting and waving of katana and the fight ends as soon as it begins, when the samurai cuts down his opponent with one stroke.

 

[Sapheron]

The more powerful two fighters are the quicker it will be over. Generally, regardless of defensive power; however tough something is makes little difference. Going on what flynx said, that's the sort of thing that would happen. If both have super speed and strength, whichever is better will win near enough instantly, if not with the very first move.

That's what it'd mean to be gritty and realistic. Fights aren't pretty; especially if people know what they're doing.

 

[Saeltari]

If the fighters are unequal it shouldn't last long at all, but check out some of the earliest boxing matches to see how long fights could go. I am thinking of the ones prior to tv.

 

[blairWitcher]

Wow you guys really gave me much food for thought and I thank you for that.

Im trying to integrate the ideas that you've pointed out in those comments. I really appreciate it. thanks!

 

[Nik]

Um, never mind 'FightClub', I remember seeing footage of a pair of 'GrecoRoman Rules' wrestlers going at each other like kilkenny cats. They were really, really good. They were so evenly matched they could twist out of holds, block moves, etc etc. It was mind-chess. Then one slipped, slightly. A few moments later, he levelled. After three frentic rounds, one won by a point. Both were near-Olympic quality, but the crowd *booed*: They were waiting for 'Giant HayStacks' & Co's pantomime performance...

 

[sloweye]

If the fighters are unequal it shouldn't last long at all, but check out some of the earliest boxing matches to see how long fights could go. I am thinking of the ones prior to tv.

All well and good, but these arn't normal humans, and i don't think a short pointless fight is really going to hold the readers imagenation. it has to be a bit gritty and superhero(ish) to show the fact they are supernatural beings. And how do you check out pre-TV boxing matches? (Genuine question)

 

[Saeltari]

Good q, and I think I got taken the wrong way. My point was that between two fighters of similiar ability the fight could last awhile, least until one has an accident or makes a mistake. The fights that they used to have, say in the 1800's, could last for hours; sure it was somewhat regulated but the length and skill were the points I was trying to emphasize. I didn't choose a very good example for my point, and yes, I have never taken a debate class .

Nik, came up with a much better example of what I was trying to get across. And I know some won't believe this but before tv there were newspapers and other written sources that can be checked out.

 

[sloweye]

Ahh, yeah. i see what you were getting at now mate

 

[Sapheron]

In the eighteen hundreds they were boxing, not fighting. There is a distict difference between the most realistic contact sports and actual combat.

If you go back to old bare knuckle boxing, as an example, they didn't punch to the face, throat, groin or back. They didn't kick, knee, elbow or headbutt. Yes, they could hammer away at each other's chests and stomachs for hours, but what does that show? One hard punch in the throat and they'd not be getting up for several minutes... if at all.

Real fights don't last.

In my opinion, as I've stated, a serious fight to the death between individuals with superhuman strength and speed would likely last a time measured in seconds. After all, with the power they have, they could kill one another almost instantly. Rather than comparing it to a battle between two unarmed humans, imagine a battle between two men with guns. Both will be very careful, not seriously attacking unless they can be sure of an advantage. When they see an opportunity, they'll go for it, and then either they'll get it right and kill the other, or mess it up and be killed themself.

If you want a close thing, try watching fencing. That's similar. The attacking power is overwhelmingly greater than the defensive power. They approach slowly and carefully. When they commit, it rarely lasts more than a second or two.

 

[sloweye]

^__________________________________^

No real fights dont last you are right, however, the point of a fight in a fantasy novel is that its not real. how dull would this book be if the fight lasted one punch. Vampires are suposed to only be killed by having their head cut off or a stake through the heart, the are suposed to be evil and strong.
Besides the fact that they are dead already and a punch to the throat would have very little efect on someone who dosen't need to breath.