Your Favourite Teal'c Quotes

[Vera]

Here’re my favourite Teal’c quotes from season 4

SPOILER SPACE:

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2

1


THE OTHER SIDE

Teal'c: "I do not consume alcohol."

Daniel: "No. Their whole world is in flames and we're offering them gasoline. How does that help?"
Teal'c: "We are in fact offering water."

O'Neill: "So what's your impression of Alar?"
Teal'c: "That he is concealing something."
O'Neill: "Like what?"
Teal'c: "I am unsure... he is concealing it."


UPGRADES

Teal'c: "I have no need to apologise."


CROSSROADS

O'Neill: "I think what Teal'c's trying to say..."
Teal'c: "I have said precisely what I intended, O'Neill."

Teal'c: "O'Neill!"
O'Neill: "Master Teal'c?"
Teal'c: "I am in need of your assistance."
O'Neill: "I'm here to serve."


WINDOW OF OPPORTUNITY

Airman: "I'm sorry, Sir. I didn't realise you were there."
Teal'c: "You have said that on many occasions. Perhaps next time I will be not so forgiving!"


WATERGATE

Teal'c (about a parachute): "This device seems to be poorly designed to provide such a function!"

O'Neill: "It's easy. Just jump and pull this!"
Teal'c: "This does not seem wise, O'Neill!"
O'Neill: "I said it was easy. Not wise!"

Teal'c: "Do not human's usually die when they are frozen?"
O'Neill: "Usually... They usually don't breath when they're dead either!"


THE FIRST ONES

O'Neill: "I'm telling you it's got to be Hawkins!"
Teal'c: "Trust me!"
O'Neill: "And what if I'm not O'Neill?"
Teal'c: "Then I was not talking to you!"


POINT OF NO RETURN

Teal'c: "It would appear this weapon is ineffective!"


TANGENT

Teal'c: "The vehicle performed within expected parameters."

O'Neill: "Was that who I think it was? And did he just say what I think he said?"
Teal'c: "You think it was Apophis. He said the gliders from which this craft is constructed contained a device designed to return this glider to his home world... then yes."
O'Neill: "He also mentioned something about dying."
Teal'c: "In the cold of space."
O'Neill: "Right."

Teal'c: "We have sufficient power and life support for several days."
O'Neill: "Several days. Well that's something. How long will this thing take to get where it's going?"
Teal'c: "Assuming this device is programmed to return to Apophis's original homeworld... several hundred years."
O'Neill: "Several hundred."
Teal'c: "Years."

O'Neill: "We just need a nudge."
Teal'c: "I am unsure of that specific measurement."


THE CURSE

Teal'c: "Daniel Jackson! We have caught nothing, we are fishing."

Teal'c: "If you require assistance, I would be more than happy to return to the SGC."
Daniel: "No thanks, I think I can take it from here."
Teal'c: "Are you certain?"
O'Neill: "Give me that!"


CHAIN REACTION

Teal'c: "On Chulak, when a great warrior retires from the field of battle, it is customary to sing a song of lament. Fortunately we are not on Chulak."

 

[peachy]

once again i appologise, i have a terrible memory,you wouldn't believe the amount of time's i've watched tapes of stargate, still don't remember, anyway
teal'c...i did not intend for my statement to be humouress.
teal'c when told he couldn't take his staff weapon with him
...i have seen your world, i will need it...peachy

 

[jsc]

1969

The gate room now a missle silo. The missle is about to be fired and Jack, Sam and Daniel run for the walls and Teal'c slowly looks up into the active end of the missle and raises his zat and fires and the missle shuts down. Loved it!

 

[Vera]

Here’re my favourite Teal’c quotes from season 1

CHILDREN OF THE GODS

Teal'c: "I have no where to go."


THE ENEMY WITHIN

Teal'c: "If I had killed you then, I would not be here now."
O'Neill: "Neither would I."

Teal'c: "I offer my knowledge of the Goa'ulds. I offer my skills as a warrior to defeat them. I pledge my honor and my life to this world."

Teal'c (about Kawalsky): "He was your friend."
O'Neill: "My friend died on the table."


EMANCIPATION

Teal'c: "What is an Oprah?"


THE BROCA DIVIDE

Teal'c (about Johnson): "General, I would prefer to not hurt this man."

Teal'c: "Perhaps you will develop symptoms later."

Daniel: "They're like lepers. The Dark Side is a leper colony."
Teal'c: "What is a leper?"
Daniel: "Never mind."

Teal'c: "How can you be so unheart?"

Teal'c: "I am not Lucy."


THE FIRST COMMANDMENT

Teal'c: "Power alone does not make one a god."


COLD LAZARUS

Teal'c: "Your world is a strange place."

Teal'c: "You received permission for me to fire my staff weapon?"
Sam: "Oh, yeah."
Daniel: "Absolutely."

Teal'c: "What is a Stanford?"

Teal'c: "Chicago. The windy city. Home of the Blackhawks, the Bulls and the White Sox."
O'Neill: "Don't forget the Cubs."


BRIEF CANDLE

Teal'c: "Perhaps it was a good Goa'uld."
O'Neill: "Right, like there is such a thing."
Teal'c: "I did not intend for my statement to be humorous."

Teal'c: "Colonel, I have learned much from you, thank you."


THOR'S HAMMER

Teal'c (about Unas): "It was dead."
O'Neill: "Ah, good."
Teal'c: "I believe."
O'Neill: "You *believe*!?"
Teal'c: "I am certain."
O'Neill: "Positive?"
Teal'c: "I am."
O'Neill: "Just a myth."
Teal'c: "A myth."
O'Neill: "Good."

Unas: "Jaffa, I am Unas, The First One."
Teal'c: "You do not exist."

Teal'c: "Are you considering the same tactic as I?"
O'Neill: "Teal'c, the cliché is 'Are you thinking what I'm thinking?' And the answer is yes."


TORMENT OF TANTALUS

Catherine: "You speak!"
Teal'c: "When it is appropriate."

O'Neill: "Alright, basic survival training. We know what we have, what do we need?"
Teal'c: "We have the stargate. We need th dial home device."
O'Neill: "Thank you, Teal'c."


BLOODLINES

Teal'c: "I will not allow my son to become a slave."

Teal'c (about the SG-1): "Warriors of great skill and cunning."


POLITICS

Teal'c: "What is right cannot be measured by strenght."


WITHIN THE SERPENT'S GRASP

Teal'c: "I believe a medical attack could be successful."
O'Neill: "Surgical attack, Teal'c."

Teal'c: "O'Neill, prepare yourself for...extreme deceleration."
O'Neill: "Yeah, thanks, Teal'c."

 

[peachy]

your quotes are awesome vera, keep them comeing they
bring back lot's of happy memories...peachy

 

[Vera]

... ok, and here're some favs. form season 2


THE SERPENT'S LAIR

O'Neill: "We've been in worse situations than this."
Teal'c: "Not to my knowledge."
O'Neill: "Thanks, Teal'c."

Bra'tac: "We die well, Teal'c."
Teal'c: "More than that, old friend. We die free."


IN THE LINE OF DUTY

Teal'c: "I'm sorry, Daniel Jackson (he zats him, kills Ashrak). Are you injured?"
Daniel: "*Dumb* question. But, thank you. I think."
Teal'c: "You are welcome."
Daniel: "Just don't ever do that again!"


PRISONERS

Prisoner: "You are very strong, yes?"
Teal'c: "I am."
Prisoner: "Maybe you challenge Vishnoor, maybe you win. Maybe... I be your friend?"
Teal'c: "Maybe not."

Teal'c (to Vishnoor): "If you once again try to physically harm myself or my companions, my patience with you will expire!"

Linea: "I've never seen such a place. It seems so... alien."
Teal'c: "So it was for me. Over time it has become... home."


THOR'S CHARIOT

Teal'c: "They will not calm down, Daniel Jackson, they will in fact calm up."


MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE

Sam: "You think it might be a booby trap?"
Teal'c: "Booby?"

Teal'c: "Undomesticated equines could not remove me."

Teal'c: "If we are to meet the challenge of the Goa'uld and further your race, risks must be taken. Your decision was correct."


SECRETS

Teal'c: "It is a lenghty tale, O'Neill."
O'Neill: "Long story, Teal'c."


BANE

Teal'c: "Remove yourself from my path!"

Ally: "Listen, you're a sitting duck down here."
Teal'c: "And ducks are bad?"


TOK'RA

O'Neill: "The good news is there's eight of us now."
Daniel: "That's good news?"
O'Neill: "Yes. More manpower."
Teal'c: "Is this another of your strange jokes, O'Neill?"


TOUCHSTONE

Maybourne: "Teal'c, it's good to see you well."
Teal'c: "In my culture, I would be well within my rights to dismember you."


THE FIFTH RACE

Teal'c: "I don't understand, O'Neill, are we preparing to dance or to do battle?"

Teal'c: "How was that, O'Neill?"

O'Neill: "And... bend your cozars."
Teal'c: "I am unfamiliar with that word."


SERPENT'S SONG

Teal'c: "Hear me, Apophis. This day will become a holy day on Chulak. The day of your death."

Apophis: "There was a time when you would die for me, Teal'c."
Teal'c: "That time is no more."


HOLIDAY

Teal'c (in Jack's body): "If I am remain in this body, I must shave my head."
O'Neill (in Teal'c's body): "You're making a joke, right?"
Teal'c: "I am not joking."
O'Neill: "Teal'c, you wil *not* shave my head!!!"
Teal'c: "It is presently my head, O'Neill."
O'Neill: "Teal'c, this is temporary!"


ONE FALSE STEP

Daniel: "Deja vu."
Teal'c: "I am unfamiliar with that term."
Daniel: "Um, it means I feel like I've been here before."
Teal'c: "That is correct, Daniel Jackson. Yesterday, when we first arrived on this planet."
Daniel: "Right. What was I thinking?"

Daniel: "Keep smiling, don't move."
Teal'c: "I am not fond of this."
O'Neill: "Me neither."

Daniel: "Can you do me a favour? Could you keep an eye on this plant thing for me?"
Teal'c: "I will keep both of my eyes on it, Daniel Jackson."


1969

Teal'c: "What is a test burn?"
O'Neill: "Just what it sounds like."

Teal'c (to Michael): "I am not at liberty to reveal my identity."

Teal'c: "The war with Canada?"


OUT OF MIND

Teal'c: "General Hammond, I hereby respectfully inform you that I must take my leave of the SGC. Therefore I am no longer under your command."

 

[Vera]

... and from season 3


SETH

Teal'c (poor Teal'c tries unsuccesfuly to translate one of Jaffa jokes... but nobody else laughs): "A Serpent guard, A Horus guard and a Setesh guard meet on a neutral planet. It is a tense moment. The Serpent guard's eyes glow. The Horus guard's beak glistens. The Sethesh guard's nose drips."


LEARNING CURVE

Teal'c: "I will share my knowledge of the Goa'uld freely."
O'Neill: "Teal'c's eager on the inside."


DEADMAN SWITCH

O'Neill: "Neck?"
Teal'c: "No."

O'Neill: "So, Teal'c, how does one Goa'uld fire weapons from several directions?"
Teal'c: "Taks."
O'Neill: "Tak'nik'atels?"
Teal'c: "Takmunitelemuniteron (sp?). Taks."


DEMONS

Teal'c: "It is a significant part of your Western culture. Have you not read the Bible, O'Neill?"


RULES OF ENGAGEMENT

Teal'c: "This is Colonel O'Neill. He is much loved by Apophis."


URGO

O'Neill: "Isn't that hot?"
Teal'c: "Extremely."


NEW GROUND

Teal'c (to Nyan): "You sound like Daniel Jackson."


CRYSTAL SKULL

O'Neill: "Look, I'm sick of layin' around. Help me up.
Teal'c: Dr. Fraiser believes you are not strong enough to undertake such a mission."
O'Neill: "Yeah, whatever." (and he falls flat on the flor)
Teal'c: "Dr. Fraiser is usually correct in such matters." (he picks Jack up and tosses him onto his face on the bed).

Love that one


NEMESIS

O'Neill: "Say something."
Teal'c: "One small step for Jaffa."

 

[Manco]

Some of my faves;

"I have served the Goa'uld. I have yet to meet a good one"

Ally: "Listen you're a sitting duck down here"
Teal'c: "And ducks are bad?"

"I did not intend for my statement to be humorous"

Anyone know of websites where i can download sounds of Teal'c speaking for my SAVO.
Bye

 

[SGPflughaupt]

What makes a Teal'c quote great....they're usually said so deadpan that sometimes theres a delay before you relise just what he said and then pow...rofl

 

[Manco]

Some of my favourite Teal'c quotes from season one:

The Enemy Within:

Teal'c: "I offer my knowledge of the Goa'ulds... I offer my skills as a warrior to defeat them. I pledge my honor and my life to this world."

Emancipation:

Teal'c: "What is an Oprah?"

The Broca Divide:

Teal'c: "General, I would prefer to not hurt this man."

Teal'c: "How can you be so without heart?"

O'Neill: "Teal'c! Doc! Open the door! Teal'c!"
Teal'c: "Colonel O'Neill?"
O'Neill: "Lucy! I'm home!"
Teal'c: "I am not Lucy."
O'Neill: "I know that. It was a reference to an old T...never mind. Open the door."
Teal'c: "I will summon the doctor."
O'Neill: "No, no, come on, I'm fine. I'm back to being myself. Just open up."
Teal'c: "I cannot be certain you are back to being yourself. You referred to me as Lucy."
O'Neill: "Oh, for crying out loud, will you just open the door?"

The First Commandment:

Teal'c: "Power alone does not make one a god."

Cold Lazarus:

Carter: "I'd love to get this into the spectrometer at Stanford."
Teal'c: "What is a Stanford?"

Hammond: "Teal'c, you'll have to leave that here."
Teal'c: "I have seen your world. I will need it."
Hammond: "Can't let you take your weapon, Teal'c. You, all of you, will be operating in public so you can't do or say anything that reveals the existence of the SGC or the Stargate." (He hands Teal'c a Chicago cap to hide his tattoo)
Teal'c: "Chicago. The windy city. Home of the Black hawks, the Bulls, and the White Sox."
O'Neill: "Don't forget the Cubs."

Brief Candle:

Teal'c: "I believe this woman wishes to spend time with O'Neill."

Teal'c: "I did not intend for my statement to be humorous."

Teal'c: "It is Goa'uld, an obscure dialect."
Daniel: "Why did you not tell me that before?"
Teal'c: "You never before inquired."

Thor's Hammer:

Teal'c (about Unas): "It was dead."
O'Neill: "Ah. Good."
Teal'c: "I believe."
O'Neill: "You believe?"
Teal'c: "I am certain."
O'Neill: "Positive?"
Teal'c: "I am."
O'Neill: "Just a myth."
Teal'c: "A myth."
O'Neill: "Good."

Teal'c: "If I am to die it will be as a warrior, facing my enemy."

Teal'c: "Are you considering the same tactic as I?"

The Torment of Tantalus:

Catherine: "You speak!"
Teal'c: "When it is appropriate."

O'Neill: "Alright, basic survival training. We know what we have, what do we need?"
Teal'c: "We have the Stargate. We need the Dial Home Device."

Bloodlines:

Teal'c: "With or without you, O'Neill, I must return to Chulak."

Teal'c: "I will risk no one's life but my own."

Teal'c: "I know the day will come when we stand side by side in battle against the false gods."

Fire and Water:

Teal'c: "On Chulak, when someone dies it is a custom to not eat for three days and nights."


Bye

 

[Lonewolf89]

These are really good!

 

[sarah2040]

'What is an Oprah?' has to be my fav teal'c quote

 

[MsGudBod]

My favorite Quote is from Chris Judge but not as Teal'c but as the avator Achilles on an Andromeda episode.

Here it is any way:

"You have 29 seconds, Impress me."

 

[Lonewolf89]

Teal'c (about the rest of SG-1): Warriors of great skill and cunning.

Teal'c: Remove yourself from my path.

Teal'c (in a space suit): One small step for Jaffa.

Teal'c: There is little to say, O'Neill. We have fought and won many battles together. It has been an honor to serve the Tau'ri by your side. We are brothers.

Teal'c: I have read of a place where humans do battle in a ring of Jell-O.

Jack: Where's Teal'c?
Carter: Trying to be popular.

Apophis: There was a time when you would die for me, Teal'c.
Teal'c: That time is no more.

 

[RJR7570]

Re: Your Favourite Teal'c Quotes

Man: I'll never tell you anything.
Teal'c: Then there are some things you should know. The Ori do not ascend their followers. And I have implanted an explosive device in your symbiote pouch.
Man: W-w-where are you going?
Teal'c: I am leaving. You are about to explode.

I cant believe this quote wasn't here.

 

[Sereomontis]

@RJR7570: That quote wasn't there because the latest comment aside from yours was from 2002, where as that quote is from season 10, which ended in 2007. Basically, it hadn't happened yet.
Also, talking about Teal'c quotes, this entire conversation is pretty much my favorite in the entire SG franchise:
S9E11 - The Fourth Horseman, part II.
Gerak: Why have you lead me here?
Tea'lc: I thought it fitting, that on this day when we must sacrifice our short-lived freedom, that we do so here, at the site of the battle of tasuk'sur, where your father gave his life for this very cause. You began to doubt the Goa'uld long before this rebellion took shape Gerak. It was your fathers death at their hands that lead you to question 'what "god" is so deserving of my worship?'
Gerak: You were not the one who was chosen. You did not witness the wonders I beheld.
Tea'lc: Did they raise the dead? Heal the sick and wounded? Destroy their enemy, with but a wave of their hand?
Gerak: The Goa'uld deceived us. The Ori's powers are pure.
Teal'c: And what is the measure of a god? Is it the scope of their power, or how they choose to wield that power? Would a god, who is prepared to lead us on the path to enlightenment, so contradict this divine benevolence by destroying all those who refuse to believe in him?
Gerak: Those who refuse to believe must die.
Teal'c: I understand how difficult this must be for you Gerak, nearing your final years you so desperately long for the enlightenment that we all seek. This is not the way to save yourself.
Gerak: I only wanted to avoid bloodshed.
Teal'c: Stay this course and you will have no choice but to spill the blood of your brothers. And you may start with me. For if I have a choice between resistance or returning to a life of slavery... Then I choose to die free.

Of course, the conversation between Teal'c and Tomin in The Ark of Truth is also great.

 

[thaddeus6th]

Ha, I'd forgotten that exploding quote.

Teal'c's a great character.

 

[Vladd67]

Ha, I'd forgotten that exploding quote.

Teal'c's a great character.

Indeed