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Time travel works any way you want it to. When you travel back in time the present you came from ceases to exist because you're not there to experience it. When you do travel back in time you increase the size of the universe by one person and one machine. This means that you have created matter...

Two thousand years of class struggle and an equal number of years of sexism boiled down to one sentence. (scuse me a moment whilst I dig out my tongue which is firmly embedded in my cheek) Story telling, for the most part, is about passing on wisdom, particularly if you think in terms of fairy...

One of the easiest ways to allow cooling within a ship is to leave one of the small windows open, two actually, on opposite sides of the ship so that the breeze can flow through and dissipate any build-up. The main problem with this method is that if you forget to close the windows at bedtime it...

1984, Fahrenheit 451, the Time Machine, Animal Farm, it's what fantasy and sci-fi were invented for. Gulliver, Alice in Wonderland, LOTR. If it's not about politics then it must be about sex. Which are you most squeamish about?

I've just had a quick scan over chapter six and it's third omniscient I'm not sure I understand what you mean by POV.

My first suggestion would be to re-think your own values and beliefs. You say it's difficult for you to take the side of the underdog who engages in terrorism. In the final analysis violence and terrorism are the last resort of the suppressed and one of the first resorts of the suppressor...

Well there's no wonder you didn't, worrying all that time about using drowned in a verb phrase.

Sorry Daisy, but unless you play nice and share I'm going to have to claim priority for the niche as I have a piece for critique from September 06 entitled 'Dragons and Unicorns'. There is some fascinating stuff about unicorns all over the interwebs when you start researching. So play nice.;)

Except places where I re-arranged a couple of sentences the main thing is that I just cut a lot of words out. (mostly ending with -ly)

I take it you haven't read very much erotica. You'd be surprised about how much goes on in a sex scene apart from the sex. You'll also probably be surprised that it's possible to write an erotic scene without any hint of actual sex. fight scenes, horse racing, debates, parties, the...

yes it is gorgeous raining. And sloweye that's nice piece of writing too. I particularly enjoyed the use of the splintered table. An excellent example of using only useful description.

I always took that as a description of Tybalts poor wit and ungentlemanly conduct. Calling him a 'jock' if you will.

That's what I was thinking when I saw the wing thing.:rolleyes:

No, you're quite right I was thinking in terms of her relationship with Carrot (and others) where she was actually embarrassed about being seen to change. Particularly from wolf to woman.

As an afterthought I'd like to point you towards Kurusawa's "The Seven Samurai" (re-made for the west as "The Magnificent Seven" The scene I'm thinking of is the one where the recruiting guy hears about a particular samurai in the district and witnesses his fight with some other guy. After a...

For the answer to that one see Angua in the discworld series.

I thought it worked very well and though the gender switch threw me a little it actually completed the transformation as soon as I realised. I see only two problems (that's not counting the wings which implies flying which implies hollow bones which are the last thing a warrior type needs)...

Given the hideous strength of vampires, their morphic abilities and general undeadedness it seems you're left with a Highlander type scenario: trying to cut each others head off.

Passive tends to be dull. This happens, then that happens, then something else happens. Things don't just happen they happen to people.

See, this is what people who care about their writing do. They read back. But you can get too involved. Many's the time that I read back on a post to a board and just back click the hell away from there, usually because I've become too involved with what I'm writing rather than what I'm trying...