Well, if Gandalf had taken a shine to some hobbit wench, resulting in a hybrid about the size of a medium-size bloke - long silver-grey hair, long silver-grey beard, skinny - it'd probably be me.
And if only Donkeyboils College of Sorcery hadn't flat refused to let me even apply (every time I tried the pen dried up and the paper turned greasy), I might have had some of the talent, too. Instead I'm 5'7" with oversize hairy feet and a penchant for odd hats - I wear a bowler 5 days a week in the shop.................. because a customer gave it to me one day and said, "now you look like a chap who sells books." As he passes the shop most days I sort of have to wear it. Its a bit of fun and people occasionally ask if they can take a picture when I stand by the door, and not being one to pass up a bit of free publicity (even if the only other person who sees it is his dad in Dusseldorf when he gets home) I'm usually up for it.
For some reason I keep getting flashes of the old Homepride adverts with the flour-graders.
One customer told me somebody he knew had asked him who the hasidic bloke in the bookshop was. Maybe the bowler is a bad idea.
I could get a top hat, but I usually dress mostly in black (I like black shirts, so quite often entirely in black), and I'd look like a funeral director who'd found a job that was slightly less smelly. Besides, Matt 'The Hat' who runs a vinyl/Cassette/CD/DVD shop in Barnstaple (Quick! Bask in the publicity, Matt) has got that covered, and he's been wearing his ragged topper since I met him back in the early 90s.
I actually get called 'ZeeZee', as in ZZ Top, by a local chap known as 'Caxton'. Sadly, the beard isn't a ZZ Top or a Gandalf yet. I put it at somewhere longer than a Billy Connolly, but shorter than a Tutankhamun. The hair is the full-on Gandalf, though. Just glad I'm skinny or I'd be getting asked to do the Santa thing a little under 4 months from now.
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Although, I have to say he isn't your lookey likey at all!
