Children's books that didn't make it

Discussion in 'Humour' started by Jayaprakash Satyamurthy, Mar 15, 2005.

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    Jayaprakash Satyamurthy

    Jayaprakash Satyamurthy Knivesout no more

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    From the slush pile of a leading publisher. really. ;)

    Children's Books That Didn't Make It
    1. Dad's New Wife Robert
    2. The Boy Who Died From Eating All His Vegetables
    3. Some Kittens Can Fly
    4. Fun four-letter Words to Know and Share
    5. Hammers, Screwdrivers and Scissors: An I-Can-Do-It Book
    6. The Kids' Guide to Hitchhiking
    7. Kathy Was So Bad Her Mom Stopped Loving Her
    8. Curious George and the High-Voltage Fence
    9. All Cats Go to Hell
    10. The Little Sissy Who Snitched
    11. You Are Different and That's Bad.
    12. That's it, I'm Putting You Up for Adoption
    13. Grandpa Gets a Casket
    14. The Magic World Inside the Abandoned Refrigerator
    15. Garfield Gets Feline Leukemia
    16. The Pop-Up Book of Human Anatomy
    17. Strangers Have the Best Candy
    18. Whining, Kicking and Crying to Get Your Way
    19. You Were an Accident
    20. Things Rich Kids Have, But You Never Will
    21. Pop! Goes The Hamster...And Other Great Microwave Games
    22. The Man in the Moon Is Actually Satan
    23. Your Nightmares Are Real
    24. Where Would You Like to Be Buried?
    25. Eggs, Toilet Paper, and Your School
    26. Why Can't Mr. Fork and Ms. Electrical Outlet Be Friends?
    27. Places Where Mommy and Daddy Hide Neat Things
    28. Daddy Drinks Because You Cry
     
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    Tsujigiri

    Tsujigiri Waiting at the Crossroads

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    Circus Cranium

    Circus Cranium New Member

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    Ha ha ha ha ha! Those are great. Daddy drinks because you cry. I'm gonna have to steal that list.
     
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    zorcarepublic

    zorcarepublic Seeker of wisdom

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    Why was #21 not published? I can't think why not...:D
     
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    Neon

    Neon Brighter than a lightbulb

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    Hehe good stuff there .... my personal fav. was "That's it, I'm putting you up for adoption", followed closely by "You are different and that's bad."
     
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    scifinothing

    scifinothing New Member

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    Omg....this is hilarious......
     
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    Rane Longfox

    Rane Longfox Red Rane

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    Pop goes the hamster and other microwave games??!!?!?!?!?! I'd set up a company to publish that, just to see the reaction:D:D:D
     
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    Alia

    Alia Young at Heart

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    My sides hurt... too funny! I have a few kids so I can see why these weren't published. I'm still laughing while I type this, so I hope this makes sense.
    My personal favorite: Curious George and the High Voltage Fence.
    I grew up on the farm way out in no man's land, population 100 including the cows. That's how sad of a town I lived in. Anyways, to keep the cows in the pastures people used electric fences or hot wires. I've touched a few and boy do they smart!!! Also, it was the dare for all the little boys to pee on the hot wires :eek: . I'm so glad I'm not a boy! Touching them by accident was pain enough.
     
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    Brian Turner

    Brian Turner Brian G. Turner Staff Member

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    I always loved that list. :)
     
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    Amber

    Amber Oh mighty Gackt

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    Such a great list!

    I must save these.
     
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    a|one

    a|one another brick in the wall

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    I'n suprised "Your are Different and thats Bad" didnt make it, sounds like a sure sell for the American government.
     
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    Amber

    Amber Oh mighty Gackt

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    Heh. Do well in the English market as well. Blair would lap it up
     

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