Picture Diary: Windows Vista Installation

[Lenny]

A few weeks ago, Leisha expressed her interest in seeing a Vista Installation:

I've never done a Vista install. I'd love to see what it's like. Can't be any worse than those awful rotating screens telling you how great XP is.

Later that day, after finally having transferred all of my Vista files onto my XP drive (for those who don't know, I've got a two hard drive system running, one running Windows XP, and the other running Windows Vista Ultimate) I formatted my Vista drive and re-installed, having learned never to play System32 Roulette again... well, unless I've got a spare weekend and nothing else to do.

Every time the screen changed during installation, I took a picture. I also took pictures of my basic settings once I'd got me a desktop and had the chance to change things to my liking, which will be shown in the second post.

So without further ado, this is my 'picture diary' of a Windows Vista Installation. Enjoy!

Click the links to see the pictures (the majority of them are linked to from the times, but some are also linked to within my comments).

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12:27: Turned on the PC, put the disc in. Nice flashing bar.
12:27: The bar soon turns to the usual message the precedes all Windows installations - "Press any key to boot from CD or DVD". After a few seconds of searching for the Any key, I mash the keyboard in anger and the installation starts.
12.28: Oh noes! I've got a screen of a picture. Has it hung already?!
12:29: Thank goodness! The language screen.
12:30: Time to install.
12:30: "Please Wait"... do I actually have a choice?
12:31: Eugh, License Terms! I'm a reader, but I'm not fouling my eyes with that. Next. Quickly, damnit!
12:31: A custom installation for me, please, my good computer.
12:32: Hmmm. 75.2gb left on my Vista drive (notice that my XP drive doesn't show up - I unplugged it before I started. Hey, you never know what might happen. Better safe than sorry).
12:32: Format!! Muahaha! Take that, you files, you! Burn! BURN!!!
12:33: Oh come on, get to the formatting already.
12:33: Free space - 148.9gb of 149.0gb. Not even installed the damn OS and already something is eating away my space. Brilliant.
12:33: And that's it for my input, for now. Let's sit and wait and watch. And take the odd photo.
12:34: A minute later, and still nothing has happened.
12:36: Ten percent done.
12:37: I was a bit bored, so I snapped a piccy of the PS/2 keyboard I was using. My USB one is also plugged in, but I'm using the PS/2 one, just to be on the safe side. Last time I played with the computer I managed to knock out the USB drivers. That was fun!
12:37: A picture of the three missing buttons. I popped them out because whenever I went to Print Screen something, I instead shut the computer down. The hilarity that ensued whenever that happened...
12:38: Halfway there.
12:41: Features installed. Groovy.
12:42: UPDATES?!! Oooops, maybe I should have left the computer connected to the intarweb? Ha! Yeah, fat chance I'm letting Windows update itself.
12:42: Flash, we only have six seconds to save the world!
12:44: "Please wait a moment whilst Windows prepares to start for the first time". Awww, the nerves must be getting to it. In hindsight, maybe I should have offered it a black coffee or something.
12:45: Completing the installation.
12:49: Oooh! Installation complete. Let's choose me a user picture (pretty kitty), and a username. And a password? No thanks, I'm on a diet.
12:51: Computer name and background? Hmmm... well I'm Lennis, and the PS3 is Lennis-III, thus the computer slots in the middle as Lennis-II.
12:52: The background I chose.
12:52: I'm sorry, do you think me a fool? I'd rather swallow barbed wire, pull it out of my rear, and floss myself to death.
12:53: After the eighth beep, it will be precisely 12:53 and 30 seconds.
12:53: Awwww, it feels the need to thank me for installing it. It's like one of those cats at the local kennelly place that is really grateful when you get it home, rubbing itself on your legs for a few hours, before it goes off and digs up the garden.
12:54: "Time is precious. More than ever, you need a system that is simple, easy, natural, and enjoyable -- so you can get things done and focus on what matters most in your life."
12:54: "It's now safer and easier to connect with the people who matter the most. Whether you choose voice, video, photos, or text, you've got an amazing array of options with Windows Vista." I would if the damned thing would let me install me webcam and graphics tablet!! I need XP for those.
12:54: "With simplified options for uploading, cropping, cutting, and creating photos, Windows Vista makes it easier and more enjoyable to share your memories."
12:54: Whilst the amusing messages are popping up and disappearing three to a minute, Vista is checking the performance of my system. How nice of it.
12:55: "With Windows Vista, you've got the hottest titles, the latest features, the most vivid 3-D graphics, and so many ways to connect you more safely with the worldwide gaming community." How much is it? $50 a year? Whilst we on this side of the pond seem to pay about double that at £40 a year.
12:55: "With Windows Vista you can quickly find programs, files, and e-mail, and it's easier to search the Internet." Damn right it's easier to search the Internet. I could find life in other galaxies quicker than Vista can find My Documents.
12:55: "Spend less time fixing problems and enjoy a faster, more reliable online experience with Windows Vista.". To quote Leisha again, "LOL!".
12:56: Finally, time to get to my desktop.
12:56: Windows Vista Ultimate. Noice.
12:58: All done!

31 minutes to install Windows Vista Ultimate, maybe a couple of minutes less because I spent a bit of time taking photos rather than bombing straight through the setup.

 

[Lenny]

Once I'd installed, I set about setting up Vista the way I like it, which basically means I went through all of the "groovy" security features that Vista offers, and I turned them off. Starting with that devil-damned UAC.

13:01: To get to UAC, you must first get to the User Account control, which can be accessed by simply clicking the user picture at the top of the start menu.
13:01: Let's get rid of this beast.
13:02: The mother of all ironies!!
13:02: And so the Mighty Beast is defeated. End-game requires a restart. When you start a new game, though, you do get to keep all of your weapons, and new bosses are unlocked!
13:11: After plugging my XP drive back in, and playing around in the BIOS (the Vista drive is actually the second drive, so the XP drive defaults to the top of the boot list), I turned my gaze and Level 79 weapons to the Control Panel Labyrinth, and the monsters within. Using my decoder ring I got in the post, the path through the Control Panel shows up in Classic List view. Take that, Windows!
13:11: The Lair of the biggest beast of them all has been found! Security Centre!!
13:11: Look at them, sat there. So arrogant with their illusion of power. Well this is one warrior they didn't plan against!
13:11: Aiiee! A wall of fire springs up as I step into their fortress. I take out my Sword of Ice +20 and carve a path through the firewall. It is defeated. Rejoice!
13:13: What is this? The monster is trying to evolve to match my fighting skillz? I cannot allow it! Throwing my sword to one side, I go against the recommended instructions, and fire a full quiver of Arrows of Denial at the beast, cutting it's magic short.
13:14: It's defences annihilated, the monster faces me and I see it in all its gory glory - Windows Defender. The bow goes the same way as the ice sword, and I draw my pair of battleaxes, preparing myself for what will be a long battle. Five minutes later, and the deed is done.
13:19: The expansion pack complete, I have nothing else to do but go back and complete the side-quests that I didn't do the first time round. But first, I don't want the game telling me every time something happens, like a minor Orc challenges me. That done, I turn my helmed head to aforementioned side-quests.
13:20: No need for remote assistance with bosses now I've finished. Off.
13:21: I think I'll go and view the scenery. For that, methinks I'll need better resources.
13:22: My castle library is full enough without needing tomes of information every time something goes wrong, thankee.
13:24: The game is finished, all the damsels of Castle Screen have been saved, thus they no longer need a saver. Off.
13:24: You know, a finished game can get quite boring after you've saved the damsels, viewed the scenery, and killed the monsters. Let's abuse the locals with extreme power.
13:24: Just because I close the curtains in my castle at times, doesn't mean I want the scenery to disappear.
13:27: And please, I may have five identical peasant units tilling my fields, but I don't want them to be classed as one. They've got feelings too, damnit!
13:28: Oh I'm bored of this. Pizza time.

End.

 

[Happy Joe]

Interesting.. and roughly parallels what I did last night (even pretty kitty).

Now, to the web and learn about optimizing/lobotomizing this critter.

Enjoy!

 

[The Ace]

Lenny, Vista isn't hard to install, just a b*tch to run.

 

[Highlander II]

I rather like the 'group similar taskbar buttons' thing - as a matter of fact - I *adore* it at work... you should SEE how many windows I have open... and I don't like scrolling through my taskbar to find things... I like efficiency

 

[Lenny]

Lenny, Vista isn't hard to install, just a b*tch to run.

I know, but Leisha wanted to see one, and I wasn't going to let the pitures go to waste after taking the time to take them.

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I abhor grouping like windows, H2. What you need is a number of monitors in a row, to make your taskbar higher, or get asecond monitor and have the taskbar filling one screen whilst your windows are shown on the other.

 

[Highlander II]

Nope. I'm incredibly picky about my task bar - it must stay at the normal size. I hated having it even one line higher.

See - I have to have maximized desktop window space, thus the taskbar must be as tiny as possible. I do have it 'hide' on my PC at work, but not at home. But yes - must group like taskbar buttons!

I don't have room for more monitors at home, but I do have 2 at work and I *still* fill them up!

 

[Erin99]

Thanks, Len! I spent a while yesterday reading through this. Wow, you went to a lot of work. Vista's installation looks a little... bland, though, doesn't it? I was expecting some great whizbang screens that showed how bling! it is.

And that page that says "the most vivid 3-D graphics" - LOLOLOL! Yes, the images certainly sell the graphics well.

Good choice with the kitty image, too. I used to have that one until I replaced it with the cute goldfish.

 

[Highlander II]

Oh yeah - those '3-D graphics' were something, huh? I'll have to run right out and get Vista right now... (not) -

If those are the graphics they're trying to sell Vista with - yeah, no thanks. *g*

 

[Ursa major]

I think you should try for the Turner Prize, Lenny. It's just the sort of thing they go for. (Installations, that is; and "borrowed work", i.e. being a curator to something that isn't necessarily art in itself.)