Marriage....

Discussion in 'Humour' started by mosaix, Jun 20, 2008.

  1.  
    mosaix

    mosaix Active Member

    Joined:
    Feb 13, 2006
    Messages:
    4,721
    After the wedding:

    Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady, and
    after the wedding, he laid down the following rules:

    'I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time
    I want -- and I don't expect any hassle from you.
    I expect a great dinner to be on the table unless
    I tell you that I won't be home for dinner.
    I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing, and card-playing
    when I want with my old buddies, and don't you
    give me a hard time about it.
    Those are my rules. Any comments?'

    His new bride said:
    'No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex
    here at seven o'clock every night...whether you're here or not.'

    -------------------------------------------------------------

    A few years later:

    The man and his wife were having some problems at home
    and were giving each other the silent treatment.

    Suddenly the man realized that the next day he would need his wife
    to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.

    Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,'Please wake me at 5:00 AM.' He left it where he knew she would find it.

    The next morning the man woke up, only to discover it
    was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight.

    Furious, he was about to go to see why his wife hadn't wakened him when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, 'It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.'



    Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.
  2.  
    HardScienceFan

    HardScienceFan 'what to eat' fan

    Joined:
    Mar 13, 2007
    Messages:
    1,912
    ROTFLMAO
    Mo,these are brilliant
    We men sure give women a hard time,don't we?
    I wonder why they put up with us
    We must have SOME redeeming quality
  3.  
    Who's Wee Dug

    Who's Wee Dug New Member

    Joined:
    Sep 11, 2006
    Messages:
    653
    That 1st one was a slight variation of what I had read before but still good.:D
  4.  
    Lady of Winterfell

    Lady of Winterfell Foxy Lady

    Joined:
    Oct 16, 2007
    Messages:
    2,163
    Those are great! :D

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